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Grandparenting With A Purpose: Holiday Edition

09 Tuesday Mar 2021

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Grandparents hold a special place in the hearts of the grandchildren. It goes both ways. Grandparents are part of God’s continuing plan to grow up disciples of His son Jesus. Take a look at Deuteronomy 6 and Psalm 78 to get a small glimpse of that plan.

We are leveraging that relationship and intentionally helping with a Grandparent’s toolbox to share their faith through a closed Facebook group entitled Faith Grandparenting and four in-person opportunities each year to share stories and resources to help them along their way we call Grandparenting With A Purpose. “You cannot be a Christian family if you are not a disciple-making family, because your family can’t truly follow Christ if you are not doing what Christ commanded – trying to become more and more like Him and leading others to do the same.” (Family Discipleship by Chandler & Griffin)

Last week’s Grandparenting With A Purpose: Holiday Edition, shared in-person and through a Facebook Live event on the closed Faith Grandparenting Facebook group, was a very special time to share life and some great ideas.

We serve a God of celebration! Through festivals, special food, visuals, decorations, and community we stop and remember the faithfulness of God: Passover, Festival of Tabernacles, Feast of Purim, Harvest time, Holy Communion. We celebrate with our five senses with special sights (lights, tablescapes, decorations), smells (food, spaces, candles), sounds (music, words), tastes (food), and touch (clothing, expressions of affection). Traditions offer rhythms for connection and belonging for which we are wired by our Creator.

Holidays like…
Thanksgiving – table cloth with names of who has shared the Thanksgiving table over the years; favorite foods and the magic of the “how” to make it; handwritten recipes and sharing the faith of the ones who started the family recipe.
Christmas – Ask “What three things will make Christmas Christmas?”; three gifts (Magi)
New Year’s – Do overs; time capsules; goals for physical, spiritual, family faith experiences.
Mardi Gras – Looking for the baby (Baby Jesus) in a King Cake; masks (God knows all of our mysteries).
Valentine’s Day – The greatest love story in all the world is John 3:16.
St. Patrick’s Day – story of St. Patrick; the color green reminds us to ‘grow in our faith’ continually and discussion of how we will do that this spring.
Independence Day – visit patriotic/historic places and share the stories of the faith of our founding mothers (Harriett Tubman, Abigail Adams, Susanna Wesley) and Christian heritage (John & Charles Wesley, George Washington Carver, Jimmy Carter).

Milestones like…
Birthdays teach our kids to celebrate others. On #1 Son’s 16th birthday we collected gifts of tools from Godly men who wrote him notes of wisdom for the tool they gifted. On Baby Girl’s 16th birthday we collected letters of wisdom from Godly women, teachers, and local officials we knew who knew Jesus and compiled a ‘Book of Wisdom’ she carries with her to this day.
Anniversaries teach kids to revisit big family moments. We will share that #1 Son and his lovely wife went to church for worship on their first date after greeting her at the end of the preschool Sunday school class she was teaching.
Spiritual Birthdays – annual celebrations of making their decision to follow Jesus with a gift, donuts (life without Jesus is like a hole in the middle of your heart), balloons (God is round about His people), they tell their faith story of when they decided to follow Jesus and how they’ve grown in the last year as we prepared a plan to move forward in the next year.
Gotcha Day – celebrating when an adoption came through to become part of the family.
Driver’s License – hold a ‘blessing of the license’; laying on of hands and speaking truth of this new responsibility.
New Home – praying through each room before moving in; a New Year’s home blessing.

Moments like….
Rediscovering the wonder of the everyday – my granddaughter remembers me when she smells biscuits and bacon.
Time to linger – breathe & sip; chill & chat
Gifts of time – my step mother checked me out of high school just to take me to lunch and we talk about the great issues of my teenage life.
Gifts of words – handwritten notes; postcards; journals; recipes; scribe the scriptures; gift a Bible.
New skills – teach about tea; take a cooking class, power tool class; shadow a church saint (Baby Girl shadowed an ER nurse from her home church to discover if nursing was really what God was calling her to. It WAS!)

For those in-person, they enjoyed an ice breaker with The Visual Faith Project, took home confetti cannons and their own Share the Love Drive-thru bags of goodies we’d prepared for our Children’s Ministry drive-thru that had taken place the Sunday afternoon before.

If the average age of a first-time grandparent in the USA is 47, this is a demographic who is leaning into Christian Grandparenting with tenacity. These are amazing disciple-makers and I want to be on their team.

How else can you build up your grandparents with a purpose of intentionally sharing their faith with their grandchildren?

“We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, His power, and the wonders He has done.” Psalm 78:4

Listen to this and other posts on the In The Trenches with DeDe Reilly podcast.

Grandparenting With A Purpose

21 Tuesday Apr 2020

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One of the most spiritual experiences of my life was the minute I delivered Baby Girl in Woman’s Hospital in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. I prayed that very minute that she would choose Jesus as Lord of her life at a very young age. Twenty months later, I prayed the same prayer when #1 Son was born. The Lord honored those prayers with a resounding YES! because I was on a mission to do all I could to make that happen. On April 6, 2012, we revisited that simple prayer the moment our first grandchild was born. More like a blessing over each one, all four grands were prayed for and God’s word spoken over each one anytime I get my arms around them.

Our culture leads us to believe that having fun, baking cookies, and gift-giving make us good grandparents. As followers of Jesus, there’s so much more. In Deuteronomy 4:9 God’s people are instructed to “Watch yourselves closely so that you don’t forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children AND TO THEIR CHILDREN AFTER THEM.” (emphasis mine) We have more than a one-generation mission to share our faith, we have a two-generation mission to intentionally tell of God’s great deeds.

Most of us learned how to grandparent by how we were grandparented. My paternal grandmother was a Sunday school teacher in her local church, but she was harsh, demanding, and that corset made her far from huggable. My maternal grandmother had the struggles of marrying at 14 in the hollers of the West Virginia coal mines. She was kind and generous though I don’t recall any conversation about Jesus. I learned much wisdom from her over a flour bowl she would use to make home-made biscuits in three times each day every summer from the time I was 10-16 years old. There was a family Bible on the coffee table and picture of a Guardian Angel on the wall of her home, yet that was their extent of grandparenting with the purpose of making Jesus Lord of my life.

The average age of a first-time grandparent in the US is 47 years old. If the best time to begin a Christian legacy in a child’s life is at the beginning, the best time to begin a Christian legacy in a parent’s life is at the beginning, it would behoove us to begin a Christian legacy in a grandparent’s life at the beginning of their tenure as a grandparent. Outside of parents, grandparents have the #1 influence in a child’s life because they typically have more time over time (long-term involvement), they’ve been around the block (offer greater wisdom), they’ve got great history with the Lord (stories of God’s faithfulness and forgiveness), and they care more that their grandchildren would have a faith in something greater than themselves. Grandparents enjoy a sweet spot in a child’s life. 

What can we do to better equip and support these disciple-makers through family ministry?  This demographic of discipleship is lacking in most local churches. I aim to be a catalyst to change that. 

“My people, hear my teaching; listen to the words of my mouth…things we have heard and  known, things our ancestors have told us. We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, his power, and the wonders he has done…which he commanded our ancestors to teach their children, so the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children. Then they would put their trust in God.” Psalm 78:1-7

Getting Organized For Advent

05 Tuesday Oct 2021

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It’s Fall Break in the school systems of North Georgia. While others are headed out of town or enjoying a staycation, it’s the week I set aside to get organized for the fall and advent season. Everything was calendared months ago, published on July 1st. Now it’s time to put some details on the Advent google docs to be shared with the lead teams for each event and campaign when they return.

Parenting With A Purpose – with a focus on Apologetics (giving God our minds to defend our faith in Jesus) we will share a Blueprint for Discipleship at Home for the fall and a teaching of what God teaches us about work in a world that only wants to play for the spring.

Grandparenting With A Purpose – with a focus on engaging in sacred conversations we’ll have a table chat in both the fall and spring with other grandparents who have navigated the hardest conversations with their grands.

New Faith Milestones
I Can Tell the Story (one for Advent, one for Lent) which will be Messy Church events using images to tell the birth story of Jesus and the resurrection story of Jesus. For Advent: soup & bread, activity themes from Matt Rawle’s new advent study, The Heart That Grew Three Sizes: Finding Faith in the Story of the Grinch. It’s a post-pandemic look at the Grinch taking the redemption story to a whole new level. The adult videos, only around 10 minutes in length are so rich I was able to write the Children’s Moments, the event stations, and a lot of the Christmas Eve service from Rev. Rawle’s materials speaking of phrases kids get like hate, words and people redeemed by Jesus, truth vs lying, and the power of music and memory.

I Can Worship With My Family – interactive, intergenerational worship service for kids with adults in the room. We bring our teaching services from the summer parking lot to Big Mac (the sanctuary). It’s a teaching service at 11am in Big Mac for worship, prayer, giving, singing, Apostle’s Creed, doxology and more when the whole family learns together why we do what we do and what makes Big Mac, Big Mac. Opening a registration link for kids and families who want to take a lead lets us communicate expectations to families and not just kids. Clarity and communication builds trust. All of the other Faith Milestones we teach separately will be now be lived out in community with our church family, not only the Children’s spaces.

Part of that organization is also getting some shopping done so the resources are on hand and we’re not scrambling hoping to find what we need.  The complete details are not on the google doc yet, but today I placed orders for….
Advent Blocks (purchased in summer at deep discount/added another church to order for even more discounts)
Red squishy hearts imprinted with “Jesus loves me”
Red, green, white, lime chenille sticks
What the Bible Is All About Handbook for Kids
Discipling Your Grandchildren: Great Ideas to Help Them Know, Love and Serve God
Prayer buddies in pompoms
God Is Three Persons
Family Advent Pop-up Calendar

Let’s not forget to be clear of the goals and the why of each experience. Every experience must be a developmentally appropriate faith formation experience. Ministry leaders are not event planners, but disciple-makers who take every opportunity and effectively use what’s in our hands to give testimony to God’s goodness and His faithfulness to His people. Determine when, where, how, who, and the discipleship follow-up for sharing the good news of Jesus and His plan of redemption and restoration in truth as the priority not the add-on or side-note. Write it down so not to be distracted by a negative comment or an expectation expressed after-the-fact. Measurable goals offer clarity, purpose, and let you set priorities to filter the could-haves and should-haves. The experience is part of your over-all strategy for faith formation, not a one-and-done.

Partnering with families means they can trust that we will be prepared to be a blessing as their calendar begins to turn into fall. Partnering well with our leadership team means they will not be overwhelmed and will have on hand the tools to be successful.

How do you get organized for the next season?

“Let the peace of Christ rule in your heart and be thankful.” Colossians 3:15

National Grandparents Day

31 Tuesday Aug 2021

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As a Louisiana gal with weekday preschool roots, I’ve never met a national holiday I didn’t like and wouldn’t leverage to put Jesus at the center.  National Grandparents Day is Sunday, September 12 and we’ll be celebrating and teaching the Biblical mandate found in Deuteronomy 6:20 to ‘teach your children and their children after them’ the decrees and commands God has given His people. National Grandparents Day always falls on the Sunday following Labor Day.

Before the pandemic quarantine we began a Grandparenting With A Purpose initiative in children’s ministry. With the average age of the first time grandparent in America being 47, this is a demographic and a remarkable moment of life children’s ministry can step into naturally. But, it was during the quarantine we got great traction with online through a Faith Grandparenting Facebook group offering specifically curated resources for grandparents to share their faith in Jesus with their grandchildren. We also offer in-person and Facebook Live workshops, one each spring and one each fall.

The pandemic has both separated grandparents from their grandchildren and has brought others geographically closer together. Many families have reset their priorities by relocating closer to grandparents or grandparents have moved closer to their grandchildren. Though the holiday is a secular holiday, it’s a natural invite for intergenerational worship and recognition. The Legacy Coalition, which provides weekly webinars to confidently equip Christian grandparents to intentionally share their faith notes, “National Grandparents Day is an important official marker of intergenerational relationships.”

To learn more about the history of National Grandparents Day, click here.

To ponder ideas to celebrate National Grandparents Day, check out…
The Legacy Coalition: Christian Grandparenting Ministry 
GrandparentsDay.org
The Legacy Project
Proper spelling and more

We are preparing a photo station and inviting the children to bring a grandparent or grandfriend to Sunday school on Sunday, September 12. We’ll open the Welcome Center early for the children to play games with their grandparents/grandfriends. They’ll attend a 10-minute small group time together, then all will gather in the large group to sing and dance and learn a bit. I will have a dedicated photographer to get all the shots. When the children return to their small group, the grandparents/grandfriends will come with me for a short, interactive lesson on Deuteronomy 6 and Psalm 78. We’ll then share how we can partner with them to confidently and intentionally share their faith in Jesus with their grands. This is what family does and we are family.

The Children’s Moment will be a ‘hands up’ blessing with copies of scriptures to pray for grandchildren (English and Spanish) found here along with other free resources found at GrandparentingWithAPurpose.com. 

Before you think, “What about the child who doesn’t bring a grandfriend?”, I’m thinking there is a small group or two of senior saints in your local church who would be thrilled to step in. After all, we are family!

“We will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, his power, and the wonders he has done.” Psalm 78:4

Chill and Chat About Children’s Ministry

04 Tuesday Aug 2020

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Recruiting and family engagement has taken on a whole new level of relationship-building. Or has it? Motivated by a spirit of compassion, love, ‘we are still in this together’, and a respect of how each person will live out their call to love the Lord their God with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength, AND love their neighbors as themselves, we proposed a Chill & Chat About McEachern Kids (MK).

Promotional Vocabulary: Children learn best to love Jesus by spending time with people who love Jesus. That’s you! McEachern Kids Dream Team’s training with Tropical Cafe’ smoothies will be on Wednesday, July 22 5:30pm-7pm.
Bring your camp chair and we’ll gather at the McEachern Kids entrance to CHILL & CHAT about the many different opportunities to serve Jesus on the McEachern Kids leadership team and have some fun.
This is for you if you’re all in, if you want to get more connected, and even if you’re just curious and unsure of making the commitment to serve when we open our doors to in-person gathering in The Treehouse.
For more information, contact dreilly@mceachernumc.org.
RSVP at…

We ordered Sunrise smoothies from the local Tropical Smoothie and with camp chair in-hand, we set up outside with appropriate social distancing. Everyone got a smoothie, a pen, a copy of the calendar hot off the presses, and an index card. The index card was to write notes to me of thoughts, ideas, concerns, dreams for MK. Earlier in the day I’d sent a text to everyone in my phone asking a set of 3+3 questions: What 3 things do you LOVE about MK? What 3 things do you WISH for MK? Our new senior pastor had asked these same questions of the staff as part of his on-boarding. My phone blew up all day with responses. Those who couldn’t respond by text and those who popped in out of mere curiosity were able to follow up with emails to the 3+3 later or write them on the index card and leave the cards in a basket for me to review after the meeting.

I’d asked two servant leaders to take notes and one to take pictures.

We chatted about small groups and tossed ideas onto the table for returning to in-person children’s programming beginning on Labor Day Sunday. We chatted about looking into the next 2.5 years. We chatted about Faith Milestones, Parenting with a Purpose classes, why we chose how we did Drive-in and Drive-thru, Christmas Eve children’s services, what CLUB345 and GLEE Club could look like. I shared stories of why we would start Grandparenting with a Purpose classes and what Camp Chair Meetings to come in September and October will look like. This team is the first to hear about Camp Chair Meetings so I needed to be clear and begin stirring much energy as they are the connectors to spread the word much better than a social media campaign could ever do. We took a tour of the Children’s Ministry spaces inside the building for the first-timers and first-lookers explaining the staging chaos for Drive-in services with the Ambassadors present telling their stories of the spaces and taking pics. “This is my favorite supply closet. This is where Ms. DeDe stores the snacks and especially the Rice Krispie Treats!,” shared by the fabulous Miss Olivia who started as an Ambassador and is now an MK intern. 

Then the ask: Would you prayerfully consider serving on the McEachern Kids servant leader team next year?

Let’s get this party started!

“Go ahead, then, and complete what your ancestors started!” Matthew 23:32

Maintaining KidMin Community While Quarantined

18 Wednesday Mar 2020

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We have many churches with dedicated champions for ministry with children, yet not at a place where a paid staff member is feasible. These devoted folks need some tangible ways to reach out, so here is a quick list of things to give a start:

https://vanessamyers.org/family-prayer-list/?fbclid=IwAR1HMHP054Goz6uyUgl7v5t7ZCxAn1HUviJO92tA0sE-6us4zJ510RhbqfU

https://vanessamyers.org/12-month-family-scripture-challenge/ I use this one to help me prepare a monthly Bible-reading challenge for families in my ministry. March is filled with scriptures that tell us some of what we can learn about forgiveness. Find the scripture, read the scripture, talk about what you read.

http://www.vibrantfaithathome.org/

www.faithkidz.com

BibleAppForKids and https://bibleappforkids.com/parents/videos

https://radio.keysforkids.org/

What am I doing?

  • Family Faith Kits – We will be preparing family faith kits available for drive thru pick up each Tuesday morning 11am-12noon at our church’s children’s entrance. Yesterday was the first day with a lesson on Daniel and St. Patrick of Ireland. It’ll be our new normal until we get back to normal. Short and sweet we shared on paper…
    St. Patrick, like Daniel, was taken from his home to live with people who did not believe in the one true God. Like Daniel, St. Patrick spent his life sharing God’s love with all the people he met. St. Patrick used the clovers which filled every field to share aspects of God: 
    1 Corinthians 13:13 – Faith, Hope, and Love
    Matthew 28:19 – Father God, His Son Jesus, and the helper Holy Spirit.
    Micah 6:8 – Do justice, love mercy, walk humbly with your God.
    Read these scriptures in your Bible, and then look for items around your house that can connect you to God like St. Patrick used the clover. Sometimes a clover is called a shamrock.

This idea came from Kate Morris of Acworth UMC: she offered the first drive-thru Sunday school kit last Sunday for families to pick up on Sunday morning during the Sunday school hour. She’s already hit all the Dollar Tree stores in the area for Bible story sticker books and is prepared for enough Sunday school drive-thrus through April. 
We prepared Family Faith kits for the next eight Tuesdays with items we already had on hand including supplies for Holy Week and Easter Sunday previously ordered and received. A trip for sidewalk chalk and bubbles, my trunk is loaded and I’ll be writing devotions with the items we had on hand like small packs of M&Ms, Sun chips, cheerleader pompoms, Easter eggs with plastic Jesus inside, silly putty prayers, dice, etc.

Ordered a ukulele – My daughter and her family live in Oregon where you can be cited for gathering in groups of 25 or more. She’s been following a quarantined guy who lives alone in China on Instagram who has shared what he’s been up to on instastories: convict exercises (exercises for inmates in solitary confinement), turn on the TV only after the sun goes down, writing letters to EVERYBODY, and he decided to learn something new…a musical instrument. I’ve played clarinet from elementary school onward, but though I can’t sing a lick, at least I’d feel cool playing an instrument I can use in ministry. It should be here by the weekend. Maybe.

Spending No Money – Outside of groceries, I decided to not make any purchases personally or to be re-imbursed by the church. Not even VBS. We will use what we have and dive into the deep end of the creativity pool.

Daily challenges on our Facebook page & emails – Not all of my families, including grand parents, are on Facebook, so I’ve got to reach out to them in ways of counting it all joy.

Grandparenting With A Purpose – Discovering that the average age of a first-time grandparent in the USA is 47, this was already the year for research so to put some things on the calendar for the next school year. I’ve got a stack of books and articles I’ve collected and now I’ll redeem the time with a focus on this untapped area of ministry.

Family Worship – Find your best seat in the living room, on the back porch, or around the kitchen table together.
Everyone gets to bring something to hold. If our hands are busy, our minds are calmer.
Say a prayer.
Let your little choose a song to sing and everyone joins in. (ex: Jesus Loves Me, God Is So Good, etc.)
Read Psalm 103 and chat about all the things we can be thankful for. Take it slow, line by line, for as long as you can.
Write or draw a note of thanksgiving to set on the table before you as an offering of thanksgiving.
Make a prayer list…everyone adds a name.
Say a ‘repeat after me prayer’ as a hand touches each name.
Say the Lord’s Prayer together.
Let it be noisy, let it be chaotic, let it be memorable.

Tea With Mrs. DeDe – Working out the kinks, but am preparing short, energetic, joyful, Bible study videos for kids and families. Will probably begin next week. 

If you ever wanted to edit and relaunch what your ministry with children could look like, now’s the time. What are you thinking about?

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

Christian Education in Minnesota

25 Tuesday Feb 2020

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Christian educators are everywhere and it thrills me to spend time face-to-face and across the table with folks from other parts of the country. I was invited to Minnesota to share ideas to get some creative conversations to take place. Totally in my element and among friends, I walked through our discipleship plan for K5-5th graders of Meat, Milestones, Mountaintop, and Marvelous Moments. Each of these four Ms are laced with Bible reading, generosity, and serving elements. Why? Because of all the spiritual disciplines we practice as followers of Jesus, research tells us that these are the three that cause us to make strides in spiritual maturity. (Ken Willard, “STRIDE”) I want to be about making strides and moving beyond baby steps in building the faith of little people. Oh we include other spiritual disciplines in our teachings, but these three take priority in our filter for what makes a true partnership with families.

Partnering with families means we only offer what is excellent, not filling up the calendar, offering low-hanging fruit and easy wins for parents in the eyes of their kids, and Jesus in everything we do.

Meat elements – That which happens on Sundays. It’s our bread and butter. It’s what we’re known for. Sunday school, Childrens’ Church, CLUB345, Ambassadors, Parenting with a Purpose, and I’m currently working on Grandparenting with a Purpose. The average age of a new grandparent in the USA is 47 years old. This is a whole area and season of ministry that I’m deep-diving into right now.

Milestones – Those intentional teaching moments that are developmentally appropriate for specific ages/grades which are foundational to building a relationship with Jesus in the local church and at home. Holy Communion (Bread and Juice), Prayer (I Can Pray), Church language (I Love My Church), Wonderfully Made (faith and sexuality education), Moving On Up to Middle School, transitioning from nursery to children’s ministry.

Mountaintop – These are those full-on-sharing-the-gospel-experiences like VBS, retreats, and Ambassadors.

Marvelous Moments – These are the one-offs, the once-a-year or once-every-two-years specials which are invitational for next steps in discipleship including shared events like Faith Field Trips, Winter Ball Invitational, Splish Splash, Messy Church, Bible Ninja Warrior, etc.

Each local church has a culture and sustains a community, so how do you choose what might be a successful marvelous moment? (1) Dashboard research, and (2) lots of personal conversations.

Dashboard research requires a drive around the community at different hours of the day to find out what businesses are plentiful, what are the traffic patterns, how far will people drive to remain in the community, and find out what other ministries are already available by checking out online the closest churches to your church.

Engage in personal conversations asking questions of the connector folks in your church, but also the locals: grocery story clerk, the deli clerk, the coffee shop barista, the UPS store, the dry cleaners, librarian. Ask questions about what evening nothing is happening (when), when do the school buses run (start time), when do your kids have to go to bed on a school night (end time), what tv shows do you like (themes), where do you go out to eat (favorite foods), where do they go to church (tell me about your church), extracurricular activities (over scheduling is not partnering with parents, but rather burdening families), where does the local school need volunteers (outside service), and the possibility of fee-based ministry outside of Sundays and Wednesdays (recreation, fine arts, music, tutoring, relationship-building).

With the knowledge that people are always interested in new things and meeting new people, shoot some bullets before you shoot cannonballs. (Jim Collins from “Good to Great”) Try something based on your dashboard research AND your personal conversations with a specific goal in mind and JUST DO IT! Give yourself lots of grace and an understanding that you are in it for the long haul. Gather a partner or two to share in the labor because as we labor and serve together, there’s a lot of laughter. And we all need more laughter in ministry.

I woke on presentation day in Minnesota with the temperature of -11 degrees. Yeah…11 degrees below zero! But inside the home of my hostess and the church where I met these amazing Christian Educators, was the warmth of the Holy Spirit on fire for sharing Jesus with little people. Thank you Minnesota CEF for the lovely invite and your amazing hospitality.

“Instruct the wise and they will be wiser still; teach the righteous and they will add to their learning.” Proverbs 9:9

Grandparent Summer Faith Fun

17 Tuesday May 2022

Posted by DeDe Bull Reilly in Uncategorized

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Twice each year we set the table for a shared teaching for grandparents who desire to share their faith with their grandchildren with intentionality. Why?

  • The average age of a first-time grandparent in the US is 47 years old.
  • Biblical command from Deuteronomy 4:9 ‘teach my commands to your children and your children’s children….’

With summer just around the corner time with our grands will look different, so we offered these suggestions and used them for conversational prompts to fill the 90-minute workshop time together. With snacks, of course!

This summer, let’s begin by ‘marking your home.’ Every faith tradition expects there to be visual elements and more to help the devout practice their faith in their home. Think of the prayer corner of a practicing Hindu, a prayer rug of a practicing Muslim, or a statuary of the Mother Mary of a practicing Catholic. What sensory elements, using all five senses, do we provide to mark our homes as a Christian home? Ideas: visual elements like our Bible, scripture (not in cursive) on artwork, appealing artwork of Jesus; smell elements like ‘we light this vanilla candle when we pray’ or baking bread; windchimes to hear as ‘the wind’ passes (can’t see the wind, but we know it’s presence…like the Holy Spirit); drink water because our great God created our bodies to work well when hydrated, etc.

Let’s hike together – Explore a waterfall, walk a prayer labyrinth, discover a local cemetery, or stroll through your neighborhood pointing out the creativity of our great God. And give that kid a stick!

Let’s cook together – Pick those strawberries and blueberries or pick up some at a local fresh food market to enjoy the sense of taste and smell offered by our great God.

Let’s grow stuff together – It’s a miracle that we can plant seeds and stuff pops up out of the ground when the Lord provides water and sunlight. Photosynthesis is a miracle and leaf colors are made real because of the wisdom of our great God. Go ahead and get that seeded watermelon and linger to talk of gardens, foods, planting, and the partnership of water, sun, and good soil as you poke those seeds. And seed-spitting competition!

Let’s read together – Read books together, especially biographies of people who endured hardships as they depended on the Lord in prayer and provision like Elisabeth Elliot, Samuel Morse, Prudence Crandall, John Wesley, Corrie Ten Boom, etc.

Let’s play games together – Otrio is our family favorite because if a kid can play tic-tac-toe, they can play, and probably beat you, in a short amount of time. It plays quickly. I learned to play Rummy, War, and Crazy Eights with a deck of cards my grandmother gave me and we played all the time. When I spent my tween-year summers with my Grandmother, she taught me how to play solitaire and properly shuffle a deck of cards. Learning to follow the rules of a game (builds trust) reminds us that God has rules for us to live by together and He is trustworthy. Learning to properly shuffle a deck of cards, I learned I can do hard things if I take the time to practice. And boy, does summer give us time to practice!

Let’s learn together – Want to know what are the stickiest and most impactful pieces of faith formation to repeat and know? The Apostle’s Creed (What do Christians believe?), The Lord’s Prayer (How do Christians pray?), and the 10 Commandments (How do Christians live out our faith in Jesus with one another in community and relationship?) In our home, we have artwork with all three pieces on the wall, on the stair landing, and on a displayed dish.

Let’s share together – Share with your grand what you are learning about Jesus in your Sunday school class, small group, prayer group. Share with your grand, and introduce them to the folks who walk your faith journey with you regularly.

Let’s worship together – Invite them to worship with you in your sanctuary and at our June Thursday family VBS parking lot service this summer!

What’s on your summer bucket list as you prepare to intentionally share your faith with your grandchildren?

“Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.” Deuteronomy 4:9

Previous posts of sharing your faith with your grands can be found here.

Family Discipleship Coaching

26 Tuesday Jan 2021

Posted by DeDe Bull Reilly in Uncategorized

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It is the call on every Christian to be Jesus-disciple-makers. Parents and grandparents are on the frontline of Jesus-disciple-making, yet where do they start? How do they fit in one more thing among laundry, grocery-shopping, school, extracurricular, and dentist appointments? This is where we come in, the local church family ministry champions, to lock elbows, share prayer space, and resource families to bring Jesus into what they are already doing.

There wasn’t near as much out there to help Christian families navigate discipling their families in the 1990s. As a young mom I recall four books which, partnered with the Bible and my local church, helped me most along my way:
Tim Keller’s Little House on the Freeway: Help for the Hurried Home
Lisa Whelchel’s Creative Correction
Kevin Leman’s Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours
Mom, You’re Incredible (white book with teal MOM on the cover and have no idea who wrote it, but it was a game-changer!) Do you sense a theme?

Today there are so many options and not near enough time for parents to curate the best, the most practical to help them as they are in the trenches of everyday. Let’s face it, there is just too much information at the end of our fingertips to go deep into anything so they are overwhelmed and just too tired. Again, this is where we come in.

I just finished the best 163 pages I’ve read this year for equipping those devoted to discipling their own families. Matt Chandler and Adam Griffin of The Village Church offer in Family Discipleship: Leading Your Home Through Time, Moments, & Milestones a practical framework of bringing Jesus into what most families are already doing in all seasons of a child’s life.

Published in August 2020, this resource provides today’s family leaders with the sigh of relief that not all family discipleship practices are enjoyed; some are endured. But, ‘our role is to plant seeds of truth, water them, and pray that God will give them life and growth as we trust in his goodness and mercy over all our shortcomings.’ (pg 21)

“You cannot be a Christian family if you are not a disciple-making family, because your family can’t truly follow Christ if you are not doing what Christ commanded – trying to become more and more like him and leading others to do the same.” (pg 30)

In the community of family, we learn best to prepare meals, serve one another, establish rules for living, protect ourselves from dangers, celebrate, and practice academic and social skills. We also learn to become more like Jesus in this community together through time (thinking about, talking about, and living out the good news of Jesus in holy habits), moments (leveraging those daily moments of life which are developmentally appropriate), and milestones (marking and making the remarkable moments of life wrapped in God’s presence and faithfulness to His people.) Each chapter offers the author’s experiences and time plans for those of us who like lists and boxes to fill in.

Time: Rather than thinking everything should be a Broadway production, lower your expectations and think about the positive, cumulative effect of holy habits over time such as Bible reading, devotional time, scripture memory, meals, prayer, worship, and service and how modeling that behavior in the adult’s life is the best teacher.
“A child disciple of Jesus Christ is a child who loves God, loves people, and imparts what God has revealed to them to others. You love what you know.” (pg 43)

Moments: Being attentive and alert to opportunities to talk about the attributes of God, foundational truths about who God is and who they are, and how God’s word is a treasure to explore and discover. As a teacher and family discipleship coach, my favorite pages were pages 122-130…so rich in practicality and narrowing down the spiritual building blocks for living as an exile in today’s culture.

Milestones: Acknowledging God’s work and faithful presence in the remarkable moments of life like births, death, losses, disappointments, driver’s licenses, graduations, starts and ends of school years, heirlooms, new homes, etc. It is in the milestones where there is a ‘tremendous opportunity to extend the discipleship process to your child’s extended family, friends, neighbors, and biblical community’ (pg 136). There are pages of examples at the end of this chapter to simply make events that are already happening spiritually memorable.

As leaders for ministry with families in the local church, we are neither event planners nor community center coordinators. We are family discipleship coaches! D6 Family Ministry shared in a December meme for the local church champions in ministry with children and families: “Good equippers do it like Jesus did it; recruit twelve, graduate eleven, and focus on three.” So glad I have a new calendar with all that white space.

“I rejoiced greatly to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as we were commanded by the Father.” 2 John 4

Listen to this blog on the In The Trenches Podcast with DeDe Reilly here.

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