Parenting With A Purpose classes offer tribe-building among our families with shared values and intentionality. The 90-minute classes include a parenting hot-topic, some dessert, discussion time, and no judgment. We started in 2018 with Sharing Your Faith With Your Family. As our families are navigating COVID-world, there is an even greater need to equip parents to be disciple-making-disciples. 

• Promotion Information: Parents, grandparents, and caregivers of children are invited to a discussion of practical ideas to navigate holy habits at home as we lead our children to love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength AND love our neighbors as ourselves on Tuesday, 6-7:30pm. Dessert will be served.
  
• Take Away: Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie Omartian
• A McEachern saint’s famous homemade fudge. (Thank you, Rebecca McCoy!)
  
  Primary Resources:
• Resilient: Child Disciples and The Fearless Future of the Church by Valerie Bell
• Faith for Exiles: 5 Ways for a new Generation to Follow Jesus in Digital Babylon by David Kinnaman and Mark Matlock (Barna Group)
• Settle For Nothing Less: Engaging Kids in a Lifetime of Faith by Jana Magruder (Lifeway)
• Stride: Creating A Discipleship Pathway for Life by Mike Schreiner and Ken Willard
• Biblical exiles who ‘won’ at following God (Joseph, Jeremiah, Nehemiah, Ezra, Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego, Daniel, Esther, Peter, John)
• Plenty of personal stories

The goal of the evening was to give research and personal testimonies to the resilient disciples who continued to remain in Christian community and a growing relationship with Jesus through the remarkable moments of life at all stages and in all ages. There is more than enough information about children who left the faith or left the church once they aged into their teens or twenties. I wanted to share the remarkable stories of those who remained faithful to grow in their relationships with God and in Christian community. These exiles are the resilient disciples who lived, are living, in the tension of culture and have continued to love Jesus and His people through it all.

A person is described as resilient who is able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions. A resilient disciple is a follower of Jesus who remains active in Christian community and Christian service when culture and geography would encourage them otherwise. The biblical prophets write throughout the scriptures of the remnant of God’s people who sought to live faithfully loving God for the rest of their lives no matter what their circumstances. We tell the stories of these brave few with wonder and admiration. There is not a Christian parent or grandparent who doesn’t want that for their own children, but what does it take for us to grow those muscles in our kids? What really matters, over time?

Major info to share:

Three practices of soul training which equip disciples to make the greatest strides in their faith in Jesus:
– Bible Reading
– Generosity
– Service

The #1, by far, best predictor of spiritual health for young adults is regularly reading the Bible as a child.

Screens disciple.

That which dictates our schedules, finances, and conversations is a family liturgy. The local church can provide the resources to equip families so that whatever they do, they can do all of life to the glory of God.

What does a resilient disciple look like?
(1) Meaningful relationship with Jesus: through community and holy habits they find JOY in Jesus. Bible Reading & Prayer
(2) Cultural discernment: they participate in a robust learning community where they can think and talk of the scriptures.
Share testimony and stories of God’s faithfulness
(3) Meaningful intergenerational relationships with Jesus-loving people: the best way for kids to learn to love Jesus is to spend time with people who love Jesus.
Active in community
(4) Vocational Disciples: a theology of work, activity, leisure, time, learning/education
Calling to honor and please the Lord
(5) Countercultural Mission: a resolve to live differently than culture though a full-on participant in culture as the light of Christ.

In this season where children are part of the Body of Christ, though not together or included in many local churches, they are indeed exiles. This research is a perfect starting point to determine priorities in the local church’s partnership with parents/grandparents to disciple their disciples. Lord, let me be found faithful to equip my families to have a robust, vibrant, joyful faith that will fuel how they nurture their children into resilient disciples: to love Jesus their whole lives for the rest of their lives.

“We want to welcome you to the resilient church of 2050…the church that has been loving Jesus for all of their lives.” Valerie Bell, from Resilient: Child Discipleship and the Fearless Future of the Church, pg 205

There’s a small book of Haggai nestled almost at the end of the Old Testament. Two chapters, 38 verses, giving relief, a break from the constant rebuke of the prophets and just before God’s silence for 400 years.

The prophet Haggai is speaking to God’s people who have returned home from exile. They return home to Jerusalem to a hot mess of 70 years of neglect, burned homes, their temple in ruins, and a burning desire for all that used to be.

They grieve what ‘used to be.’ They start their sentences with, “I remember…” then it trails off with sadness and lament. When they first returned home they started to rebuild the temple. They got the foundation done, then they got distracted. Distracted for 18 years. Distracted by probably very good things, but distracted nonetheless and the work of their temple stopped.

God calls Haggai to speak correction and encouragement to the discouraged and distracted exiles. Through Haggai’s words, GOD breathes life into His people. He says,

“Give careful thought to your ways.”

“Be strong….and work.”

“Do not fear.”

“From this day on, I will bless you.”

The response of God’s people? They got to work! They built the temple from the foundation already laid. They built together. They remembered that God was still in control. And they remembered that God sees and blesses and lives in the middle of obedience in the right now. The temple would not resemble the temple they remembered, but they don’t wallow in the distraction of comparison. They did what God directed them to do: they rebuilt their spiritual house together as they heard these words and God stirred the Spirit:

“Give careful thought to your ways.”

“Be strong….and work.”

“Do not fear.”

“From this day on I will bless you.”

This speaks to me as we live out our faith in Jesus in rebuilding our faith-filled lives at home and in our local churches in this post-pandemic world.

The book of Haggai tells me, “Don’t be distracted by the health crisis, politics, the unknown future, our finances. Don’t be discouraged by the global or denominational church, social media, all the feels and all the fears.” Don’t compare and don’t despair.

These words of correction and encouragement are for us today!

First, in the words of Jesus, REMEMBER ME:
Remember Jesus, God’s own son, who came from heaven to earth,
Remember Jesus, who died for our sins to restore our relationship with a holy God.
Remember Jesus, who walked and talked for 40 days to more than 500 people after he rose from the dead on the 3rd day, including his brother James, (can you imagine that conversation?)
Remember Jesus, who returned to heaven so that we’d be given a comforter, a guide, a coach in the Holy Spirit
So that we would tell all in our world that Jesus came to take away the sins of the world…..

So what do we do? I look at Romans 13. In the most horrendous culture imaginable for Christians, the apostle Paul gives us some practical guidance, but essentially…..

We go close and go long.

Go close: with our family. Those with whom you have the greatest influence, over time. Your spouse, your parents, your kids, your grands. Be intentional about building and teaching the faith in Jesus in your own house. The research tells us that the 3 practices/holy habits which repeated OVER TIME propel us to make STRIDES in our faith in Jesus is Bible Reading, Prayer, and living generously with our hands open. Go close brothers and sisters.

Go long: Our great God is still working within us, among us, and beyond us. I settle with Romans 8:28
“AND we know that in ALL THINGS God works for the good of those who love Him.” Go long brothers and sisters.

When I get discouraged or distracted, we have some amazing examples of what going close and going long look like:

Esther: Y’all! We WERE created for such a time as this!

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego: They stood together and told the king: “If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is ABLE TO DELIVER us, BUT EVEN IF HE DOES NOT DELIVER US, we want you to know your Majesty, THAT WE WILL NOT serve your gods or worship anything but our great God.”

Daniel: There is one statement made by the meaners in Daniel 6 which stopped me in my tracks. When the meaners wanted to oppress and bring harm to Daniel, these were THEIR words: “We will never find any basis for charges against this man Daniel, UNLESS it has something to do with the law of His God.”

Lord, let us be found faithful to go close and go long.

Give careful thought to our ways.

Be strong….and work.

Do not fear.

We know our great God is with us because He keeps His promises to His people.

Listen and subscribe to the In The Trenches podcast.

“‘Go up into the mountains and bring down timber and build my house, so that I may take pleasure in it and be honored,’ says the Lord.” Haggai 1:8

It is the call on every Christian to be Jesus-disciple-makers. Parents and grandparents are on the frontline of Jesus-disciple-making, yet where do they start? How do they fit in one more thing among laundry, grocery-shopping, school, extracurricular, and dentist appointments? This is where we come in, the local church family ministry champions, to lock elbows, share prayer space, and resource families to bring Jesus into what they are already doing.

There wasn’t near as much out there to help Christian families navigate discipling their families in the 1990s. As a young mom I recall four books which, partnered with the Bible and my local church, helped me most along my way:
Tim Keller’s Little House on the Freeway: Help for the Hurried Home
Lisa Whelchel’s Creative Correction
Kevin Leman’s Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours
Mom, You’re Incredible (white book with teal MOM on the cover and have no idea who wrote it, but it was a game-changer!) Do you sense a theme?

Today there are so many options and not near enough time for parents to curate the best, the most practical to help them as they are in the trenches of everyday. Let’s face it, there is just too much information at the end of our fingertips to go deep into anything so they are overwhelmed and just too tired. Again, this is where we come in.

I just finished the best 163 pages I’ve read this year for equipping those devoted to discipling their own families. Matt Chandler and Adam Griffin of The Village Church offer in Family Discipleship: Leading Your Home Through Time, Moments, & Milestones a practical framework of bringing Jesus into what most families are already doing in all seasons of a child’s life.

Published in August 2020, this resource provides today’s family leaders with the sigh of relief that not all family discipleship practices are enjoyed; some are endured. But, ‘our role is to plant seeds of truth, water them, and pray that God will give them life and growth as we trust in his goodness and mercy over all our shortcomings.’ (pg 21)

“You cannot be a Christian family if you are not a disciple-making family, because your family can’t truly follow Christ if you are not doing what Christ commanded – trying to become more and more like him and leading others to do the same.” (pg 30)

In the community of family, we learn best to prepare meals, serve one another, establish rules for living, protect ourselves from dangers, celebrate, and practice academic and social skills. We also learn to become more like Jesus in this community together through time (thinking about, talking about, and living out the good news of Jesus in holy habits), moments (leveraging those daily moments of life which are developmentally appropriate), and milestones (marking and making the remarkable moments of life wrapped in God’s presence and faithfulness to His people.) Each chapter offers the author’s experiences and time plans for those of us who like lists and boxes to fill in.

Time: Rather than thinking everything should be a Broadway production, lower your expectations and think about the positive, cumulative effect of holy habits over time such as Bible reading, devotional time, scripture memory, meals, prayer, worship, and service and how modeling that behavior in the adult’s life is the best teacher.
“A child disciple of Jesus Christ is a child who loves God, loves people, and imparts what God has revealed to them to others. You love what you know.” (pg 43)

Moments: Being attentive and alert to opportunities to talk about the attributes of God, foundational truths about who God is and who they are, and how God’s word is a treasure to explore and discover. As a teacher and family discipleship coach, my favorite pages were pages 122-130…so rich in practicality and narrowing down the spiritual building blocks for living as an exile in today’s culture.

Milestones: Acknowledging God’s work and faithful presence in the remarkable moments of life like births, death, losses, disappointments, driver’s licenses, graduations, starts and ends of school years, heirlooms, new homes, etc. It is in the milestones where there is a ‘tremendous opportunity to extend the discipleship process to your child’s extended family, friends, neighbors, and biblical community’ (pg 136). There are pages of examples at the end of this chapter to simply make events that are already happening spiritually memorable.

As leaders for ministry with families in the local church, we are neither event planners nor community center coordinators. We are family discipleship coaches! D6 Family Ministry shared in a December meme for the local church champions in ministry with children and families: “Good equippers do it like Jesus did it; recruit twelve, graduate eleven, and focus on three.” So glad I have a new calendar with all that white space.

“I rejoiced greatly to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as we were commanded by the Father.” 2 John 4

Listen to this blog on the In The Trenches Podcast with DeDe Reilly here.

We started teaching the Christmas story last Sunday…in November…in the Sunday school discipleship hour….with power tools, a virus kit, six boxes of Legos, slime, stickers, gold beads, and money.

The research from Lifeway, The Barna Group, and in my own personal experiences continue to report that one of the most impactful and equipping opportunities offered by the local church community for students who never left their faith as teens or young adults was to give young people experiences in vocational discipleship….robust conversation with Titus 2 men and women who love Jesus and are living out their calling in the world.

“Vocational discipleship involves being aware of the career aspirations of teens and young adults in our communities, and helping them to connect those goals with how God designed work.” (Faith For Exiles by Kinnaman and Matlock, pg. 156)

This is how we will teach the Christmas story this season through these experiences.

Families registered their students for their top two preferences of small groups for the seven weeks of November and December. They will remain in these small groups, in these specific spaces, with this leader for all of November and December.

K5-2^nd grade – Knowing God through Sticker Art, Science, Lego building, and Games led by a musician, a scout leader, a dentist, and an evangelist. All are living out their calling to love the Lord and their neighbor in their chosen, skilled vocation.

3^rd grade – We have a rite of passage/ tradition of this age level learning and making Chrismons in November then will become part of a class of K5-5^th graders for Nativity worship art in December, as well as any students who begin attending after the November 8^th  led by an art teacher of the year who loves the Lord and her neighbor.

4^th & 5^th grade – Knowing God through Nursing Science, Power Tools, Money Matters, and Worship Art led by a nurse, a general contractor, an accountant, and another art teacher of the year. All who are living out the great commandment and great commission in their daily line of work.

Each week they’ll lead their small group in learning about the major players in the Christmas story: Zechariah, Elizabeth, Gabriel, Mary, Joseph, Shepherds, the posse of animals and angels, Jesus, and the Wisemen.

The weekly online classroom will be set up each week to learn more about each major player which will also serve as the background for each of the leaders and our families with curated online content. The leads will teach the who (basic facts of the major player), the where (find it in the Bible), and the WOW! (why it matters) along with a discussion question. Then they are off to learn the focused skill for the remaining time.

With the goals of vocational discipleship, dedicated time spent with Titus 2 men and women (the best way for kids to learn to love Jesus is to spend time with people who love Jesus), and a call to families to “come on home,” I can’t wait to see how God will continue to grow kids’ hearts and minds, hands and feet, to the One and Only who loves them best: Jesus!

“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord.” Colossians 3:23

Mr. Bob and I have just finished watching Amazon Prime’s World’s Toughest Race. 66 teams of five, four team members and an assistant, navigating over 500 kilometers/350 miles with nothing more than a map, a compass, and each other. Where the Ironman is an individual race, this is a team endeavor all the way. There are multiple checkpoints in the Eco-Challenge where they all engage in hiking, running, biking, swimming, paddle-boarding, repelling, rowing, sailing, rafting, climbing, and more all to be completed in eleven days hosted by Bear Grylls.

The co-ed teams are made up of various extreme sports athletes of various ages and stages in life. There is an 18 year old racing with his dad, a dad racing with his two daughters, men who have shared life in sports for more than 25 years, twin sisters, and even a dad with early onset Alzheimer’s racing with his son and two friends who is an icon in the Eco-Challenge community. The assistant team member provides clean clothes, racing equipment like mountain bikes, hot food, and all the cheering encouragement they have in them at each checkpoint to support the racing team members. Broken bones, concussions, cuts, boats falling apart in the dark, hypothermia, jungle rot, infections of every kind are treated by medical volunteers all along the way. If and when they cross the finish line the assistant team member is there to meet them and they cross over together. It takes planning, preparation, and sometimes sheer grit to finish the race. Their reward? A medal and I’m sure there’s a t-shirt in there somewhere. 

We in ministry with children and families are on the world’s toughest race. We are called to provide, secure, implement, and follow up the sharing of Jesus in multiple modalities, in multiple developmentally appropriate ways, in an unknown land, with nothing more than a map (Bible), a compass (prayer), and each other. Where many in the local church are just now trying to get their ministries off the ground after being on the sofa for almost six months, we’ve been at it like extreme athletes. We grieved for what was lost in April, we pivoted to build new servant-leader teams in May, we have the scars of repelling into summer on the sharp rocks in June, the weariness of rowing in rhythm in July, the hypothermia of frigid and frozen leadership in August, yet we continue to do what we didn’t even know we couldn’t do heading into fall.

Phone conversations with my peers this week included “I don’t want to be part of something that is dead,” “They called me and told me I share too many ideas in the staff zoom meeting, so I need to pull it back,” and “I feel I’m in a Whack-A-Mole game and all of my fellow staff members have a quarter.”

Hear me clearly….YOU were created for such a time as this! YOU were a Jesus-follower before you were a staff member, so you have permission to share the love of Jesus in whatever way possible on a personal level. Release any expectation you have for the people you are waiting to hear from. Really! Sing the song, “Let it go! Let it go!” Take a day and both grieve and celebrate the ministry you led before. Write it down. Look at the pictures. Then get up and go big by thinking small.

How do you go big by thinking small? Like the teams on The World’s Toughest race, there will be times to row, to climb, to swim, to hike, to bike, to eat, to rest, to keep going at multiple checkpoints in a new way. Keep moving. Only those who will speak life and live out innovation and creativity with a can-do, positive attitude and who are moving can speak into your life. Oh the eye-witness stories we have read and studied of that short season when Jesus led his closest disciples. He taught them, rebuked them, loved them, lived life with them, and died for them. We’ve been reading and studying those stories for two thousand years and people have come to a saving knowledge of Jesus because of them.

Jesus healed one at a time. Jesus taught most effectively in small groups. He walked. He slept. He ate. He laughed. He prayed. He took time alone, then because of His compassion, He lingered with the lonely, the wandering, and the lost.

For those in large churches…. think old school and lots of really small groups. Jesus’ smallest group was three: Two Sons of Thunder and the one who said, “Lord, if it’s you, call me out on the water.” A small group and in a small amount of time, they rocked the world for Jesus! No bells and whistles (technology). They used what was in their hands like fishing, stories of fiery furnaces, eye-witness testimony, a boy’s lunch, dreams and visions as they met along the way (parks, driveways, parking lots, text messages, phone calls, postcards, notes, and chalked neighborhoods.)

1. What’s in your hand? (Exodus 4:2)
2. Who’s on your team? (Matthew 18:20)

Sonja Wieck, a multi-Ironman competitor, heard about “the race that eats Ironman for breakfast.” She took it as a personal challenge. I won’t tell you what happened, but something she said stopped me in my tracks, “I was made to do hard things.” 

Because YOU love the Lord YOUR God with all YOUR heart, soul, mind, and strength and love YOUR neighbor as yourself….. go into all the world and make disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world. YOUR world. It’s not going to be easy, but you were called for such a time as this and you can do hard things especially among the remnant of the exiles.

The World’s Toughest Race is not easy and we run our race for so much more than a medal and a t-shirt. Just think of the stories of God’s faithfulness you will have doing hard things! Let’s give ’em something to talk about for years to come! Because WE WERE CREATED TO DO HARD THINGS. I’m on your team and I’m cheering you on! And I’ve just placed an order for new t-shirts.

“My zeal wears me out.” Psalm 119:139a

Yesterday was our monthly children’s ministry networking lunch. Two weeks ago, I and another kidmin champion drove an hour and a half to another district’s children’s ministry networking lunch. I learned and discovered several things that will be game-changing for me. I always do!

Two weeks ago… I learned how a QR code might be the answer to offering free registration links to VBS and other special events for our families who receive assistance through Backpack Blessings, Food Pantry, and other outreaches from our local church; Nerf Wars; planning scheduled 18 months out; low birth years; upcoming Children’s Ministry Institute dates for 2020.

Yesterday… We talked Christmas Eve family programs with silhouettes, cowbells, bags, headbands, musical dramas, and themes; Safe Sanctuary and updating staff policies for staff hired under the age of 21; fall festivals in October; Hoedowns in November; nursery staff; organizational science; job descriptions; recreation ministry; fall retreat registration hard deadlines; 2020 Wonderfully Made events where we can share the event with smaller churches and diverse locations; profiles for volunteers (in response to a speaker from Catalyst Conference); and so much more.

I can’t imagine having to come up with every new idea, re-inventing the wheel for every event, or doing ministry well without the input of other voices and experiences. These folks are the most creative people I know and I need face-time with them. Table life with them. We are better together! Just this last weekend, three of our churches gathered for the first annual Family Campout sharing kayaks, meal duties, tents, cabins, water, s’mores, communion on Sunday morning (clergy camped, too!), hikes, games, lingering beside a campfire or the lake.

There are several of us who share events like the Family Campout on a regular basis. What’s next? The Friday before Christmas is an early-release day from school so we’ve planned a Christmas Faith Field Trip. Five of us will take our 3rd-5th graders to meet up at Red Top Mountain for putt-putt golf, play, and some caroling practice. Then on to one church to prepare food boxes. We’ll all deliver food boxes to families in an area which receives summer lunches in a flash mob of Christmas carols. Then we’re off to pick up hot-dog or pizza-slice dinner at the local Costco to break out in song again. Really! Costco on the Friday night before Christmas! Next stop? Festival of lights in a town nearby. Afterwards we’ll all finish the night at another church for hot chocolate and reindeer games before each church heads home. We’ll basically be covering our entire district from 2-10pm. One of the kidmin leaders was even able to secure a grant to provide for the food items for the food boxes. Yeah, we’re better together.

Who are you sharing life and ministry with?

“One of the factors of the most resilient is meaningful relationships.” David Kinnaman, President of Barna Group, from a 2019 Catalyst talk, “Faith for Exiles”