The gold-framed Guardian Angel picture followed my maternal grandparents to every home they lived in. They moved from the coal mines of West Virginia to Virginia to Florida then back to Virginia. They also kept a huge, white family Bible on the coffee table. These are the images I recall from my childhood related to their faith.

In Family Driven Faith: Doing What It Takes To Raise Sons and Daughters Who Walk With God,  Voddie Baucham, Jr. speaks of marking the home as God’s territory. He shares the memory of his Buddhist mother. Her regular practice of that belief system involved all five senses: a black lacquer box in the corner of their dining room, a statue of Buddha, a scroll of strange writing, incense, fruit, beads, and a small gong or bell. Those images remain with him to this day even though she became a Christian within six months of his conversion.

“Imagine the impact that Moses’ teaching had on the children of Israel in the Promised Land.” God’s people were entering a new land with new smells, sights, sounds, tastes, yet were expected to retain their distinction as followers of the one true God. How?  Marking their doorposts, celebrating annual feasts with bitter herbs, unleavened bread, and the stories. Oh, the stories, the stones, the Sabbath practices, the music, and so much more.

My BFF-in-the-Lord just set up her new office space with bright yellow chairs and throw rugs to cover floor stains. She has stuffed animals (you know, the holy stuffed animals like sheep, donkey, lamb, plush Jesus which are staples for family faith experiences) on shelves and filled a wall with pictures of remarkable moments with the people of God she has served alongside. Visual reminders of creative, innovative, hard, hilarious moments in time where she served her families in ministry with great zeal and joy. She has marked her space as the Lord’s.

How can we regularly and intentionally mark our spaces and places for the Lord? At home? At church? At work? Sticky faith formation experiences engaging all five senses.

Engaging Eyes
“There was a period in history when anyone who wanted to be considered a serious painter, a grand master, painted biblical themes.”
At this week’s Faith Milestone: Bread & Juice Class, we’ll pull out the jumbo framed picture of Da Vinci’s Last Supper for our kindergarten and first grade students to stand behind for their class photo.

Engaging Ears
“Music is an incredible medium. With a few notes we can be transported to another time and place.”
Preparing for this week’s S’more Jesus Late Night with our 3rd-5th graders, we prepared a Spotify playlist with camp songs. Sent it out ahead of time to the leaders and the children.
Dr. Richard Hunter offered a sermon based on his daughter’s favorite song, at the time, Tim McGraw’s Live Like You Were Dying at my home church. There are some messages super sticky because of a song.

Engaging Taste
“There is no such thing as Christian food.” Well, I beg to differ.
I recall a young pastor at my home church who prepared a summer sermon series based on breakfast cereals. I’ll never be able to look at a box of Frosted Flakes the same again.
Goldfish? Cheerios? S’mores prayers? Bread and juice? 

Engaging Smells
“I could almost smell the Sunday dinner as he described in great detail his vivid memory of every aspect…”
Dr. Doug Thrasher gave a sermon at my home church about Sunday dinner with biscuits and gravy on a communion Sunday. I’ll never forget the intentionality of a mama setting the Sunday table for her family and the planning involved.

Engaging Touch
“Have you ever walked into a home with one of those enormous family Bibles? I mean the kind you have to open with two hands.”
When a local UMC church was closing in our district, one of my moms went to the garage sale the church was having. It was her home church. She asked about the Chrismons which were a sticky faith formation experience of her now art-teacher-of-the-year faith journey. They pulled them out and gave them to her! Even before this, she had led our 3rd graders in October and November for the last four years in a rite of passage to make and learn about Chrismons. She leads those students to decorate the children’s large group space each year for Advent: Hanging of the Greens. Lots of gold beads, lots of white styrofoam, lots of conversation, LOTS of stick pins. The Chrismons of her home church are now enjoyed and shared with her students at her son’s home church. The Chrismons of both churches hang together in our children’s spaces.

In my weekday preschool days, we displayed an apple when we studied apples. We ate apple stuff, counted apples, played with apples, used apple-scented shampoo in the water table, read apple books, painted with apples, and did everything we could possibly think of with apples.

“It all comes down to a simple question: Why are we here?” If our local church, and our family, exists to know Jesus and make Him known, how are we intentionally marking our lives for Him in the stickiest ways possible, through our five senses? At home. At church. At work.

“You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.” Deuteronomy 6:9

We were flying by the seat of our pants last summer when we came up with the summer drive-in services. Our goal was to offer a weekly gathering of developmentally appropriate faith formation experiences for littles with their bigs in the vehicle so that our community wouldn’t grow accustomed to doing life without us, the local church.

Each week was a theme, a Jesus story, games to build visual, sticky memories for kids, and short teachings, with practice, for bigs to lead their littles in the holy habits of prayer, conversation, music, service, and play. At the end of the summer, we offered weekly camp chair meetings on Thursday evenings and Sunday morning programming in the parking lot. Still doing whatever it took for our families to not grow accustomed to doing life without us.

With the incredible fruitfulness of last summer of new families becoming active in our local church and already-connected-families growing more in relationship with each other and the local church, we chose to continue the summer drive-in services in 2021 in place of the typical vacation Bible school with edited criteria in mind: 

1. Summer-long theme of We Are Family 
2. Celebrate different members of our families
3. Invite other ministries to be highlighted by serving and speaking each Thursday

The drive-in services we saw were for adults with kids in the car. Ours was for kids with adults in the car. 20-30 minutes in length (because it’s hot and considering the attention span of a little), at 6pm and 7pm (because families have different schedules), every Thursday rain or shine (because families need dependable and trustworthy expectations), and we just provide the environment (big visuals, kids want to come, parents/grandparents are the heroes, and we are just the coaches).

All of these have hit the mark. 

It’s the bonuses which have helped us sharpen our intentions moving forward:

1. Every week we have new families.
2. Every week our families are inviting other families.
3. Every week we have purposeful intergenerational relationships growing through service similar, but greater than, a week-long VBS.
4. Every week we have current ministries growing because they’ve had a new platform to introduce and ‘work the parking lot’ in extravagant hospitality with the community.
5. Every week we have new servant leaders joining the children’s ministry team as they learn we are prepared, organized, have trustworthy systems, are irrational in hospitality and innovative faith formation. And we laugh our heads off.

What’s next? 

An innovation ideation team has formed to add to our Faith Milestone initiative… Faith Milestone: I Can Worship With My Family. 

We’ll start by bringing in the developmentally appropriate faith formation experiences of the summer to an indoor space filled with visually traditional elements for the first Sundays in October and December. Both Sundays lend themselves to intentionally using all five senses (World Communion, Advent). 

Resources we’ve studied include…

Mark Burrow’s Children First at Ft. Worth
First UMC, Sadie Wolfhart’s Children’s First in Bentonville, Arkansas, and Kevin Johnson’s UMC Discipleship webinar.
Children First: Worshipping with the Family

In answer to, “What’s in our hand?”, we have the original sanctuary we can use to make a small group feel like critical mass. We will have Ambassadors leading different elements, American sign language for the Apostle’s Creed and Gloria Patri, irrational hospitality by our families intentionally inviting another family they share life with to experience worship as a family. It’ll be an intentional on-ramp to what our much larger sanctuary service offers in the weeks immediately following the Faith Milestone. Other Faith Milestones are already in place, so this would be a place to practice all of those in a teaching environment for little people. Intergenerational in message delivery, doctrinally-sound energetic song choices with motions upper elementary kids will love, and in 45 minutes. With color and interactive throughout, older kids will serve, little kids will learn, new families to our rituals will share in the experience so that we learn in a safe setting not just that we gather but why we gather: Jesus.

All discipleship programming should offer an onramp or an invite to take the next step in discipleship, another relationship within the local church. How has your summer discipleship programming made a way for families to take their next steps in your faith community?

“Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, my God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your  mighty acts to all who are to come.” Psalm 71:18

My current pastor gently corrected a colleague recently when she referred to our servant-leaders as ‘volunteers.’ PTA recruits volunteers. We recruit servant-leaders.  Most of my conversations with colleagues at other churches revolve around building their servant-leader team. Anyone else feel like a new church start? Yep, we all do!

I had a great conversation with a new-to-director Children’s Ministry champion last week and we chatted through several ideas:

Open House – Invite all kids and their parents/grandparents to a 30 minute open house after a Sunday service. Build it up, think sandwich boards worn by kids to promote. Post jumbo post-its on the walls in the kid’s area with “Sunday Morning”, “Hospitality”, “CLUB345”, “Missions”, and “Special Events” with cups of crayons below each one. Pull a Vanna White sharing a 1 minute elevator pitch in front of each one inviting those in attendance, “If you’d like more information about >>>, write your name and email/phone number on this post-it note (their choice for how to be contacted), and our team will get back to you.” Every 10 minutes, play a game of rock, paper, scissors for prizes OR pull carnival tickets for $5 RaceTrac/QT gift cards for tasty beverages. Prizes for kids AND adults in attendance. End in a fun interactive prayer and make those phone calls by week’s end.  Lots of energy, music (bluetooth speaker, even), and have your kid’s space shine!

Chill & Chat  or Taco ‘Bout – Promote this 1.5-2 hour event as a time to ‘get more information’ about the church’s ministry with kids/families.  Put up the jumbo post-it notes with similar headings as above and offer  a similar 1 minute elevator pitch followed by inviting someone in the room to share a story about their experience in that area. Lots of other voices will be telling great stories. Offer a take-away book with some meat to it that speaks to how the ministry will support them as parents, grandparents, etc.. Your current servant-leaders are your best recruiters so give time for some general chatting. Follow up with thank you notes to everyone who attends and especially those who shared a story. Offer a tour of the spaces, too. I have Ambassadors take care of this part. This is also where parents/grandparents get the first-look at what’s coming in the ministry for the upcoming season or school year.

Mission Field – Bring a suitcase and visit an adult Sunday school class. Say, “This is what I know about you. As a Christian you always wanted to be a missionary.  But you had to work, had little people, or maybe were taking care of big people. Perhaps now is the time. What if I were to offer you a 1-year gig (big hairy ask!) and you wouldn’t have to take shots and you could sleep in your own bed? Would you consider it? Being a missionary, I mean?” Give pause. Say, “I’m asking you and a friend to serve as a missionary, one month on and one month off, to serve in the mission field of children’s ministry on Sunday morning for 1 year.”  “I ask for you and a friend because Jesus never sent our his disciples one at a time, but in pairs or threes or up to 70 to do what He asked, and He asks in the scriptures for us to lead the littles to Him.” Oh, and come bearing goodies by bringing a box of biscuits or donuts along with the suitcase.

Church Committee Meetings – Find out when the Trustees, Staff-Parish Relations, and Finance Committees are meeting next. Leave a box of yummy goodies, a bowl of ice, cold water bottles, you get the idea. Add a note or picture signed by kids in your ministry inviting one (and a friend…see above) to serve together at an upcoming event, or say THANK YOU for making the ministry possible by the decisions they make. It will delight them to know you appreciate their hard work of ministry, too.

Lord, Who? Prayers – Write Lord, who? on your car windshield with a sharpie and as you drive pray for a name to reach out one-on-one. One-on-one invites are the best and really should be done all the time.  Whoever the Lord gives you, make contact. Don’t’ talk yourself out of it. You never know how the Lord is working in that person’s life and they are just waiting for the invite to do something about it.

Youth Milestone – If you have access to your church’s youth group, make serving in Children’s Ministry a faith milestone of one month on and one month off for a year. Make them jump through the hoops necessary for training and equipping so they are aware of the expectations to be a great servant-leader. This is first-job training kind of stuff. Talk to them about what they’re doing well. You can talk to them about how they can do something better. Speak into their lives the opportunity to serve others well and with excellence and be sure to tell them WHY something is important. Remind them they’ll need reference letters for jobs and college program applications in the future and you can help them with that.

Faith Milestones and Grandparents – Faith Milestones are those once a year special events which mark a remarkable season of life with a spiritual training like Bread & Juice, I Can Pray, Acolyte, I Love My Church and the like. We require our students to have an adult with them at most Faith Milestones. If that adult is a grandparent, that grandparent is all-in to support and join in sharing sacred experiences. I will always reach out the next week to invite him/her to serve at something their grand might participate in.

“We are many parts of one body, and we all belong to each other.” Romans 12:5

I was being debriefed by a very knowledgeable facilitator a couple of weeks ago. As she introduced herself to me I discovered she was a clergy spouse, incredibly experienced  and accomplished in the hospitality field, and the church she served did not have a ministry with children. Hmmmm…

I hope I get to speak with her again, because the innovator in me just started jotting down ideas for how they could begin a ministry to the families and children in their community. 

If they have a parking lot, what if they secured some orange barrels or cones and offered driving lessons? Our home church had a large parking lot. When they realized parents were bringing their new drivers on campus for driving practice, they purchased a couple of tall orange cones and set them out in the parking lot. Those cones moved all over as helps for parallel parking and the like.

What if her church notified a local driving school and offered to do a blessing of the driver’s license twice a year? What if a part of a Sunday service was to bless driver’s licenses? What if they offered parking practice and even a vehicle to some single parents from 10am-12noon on the first Saturday of the month even if just in the parking lot? With the parking lot, what if they offered to the local businesses or schools a place for meeting, overflow parking, emergency evacuation?  

Because she is incredibly accomplished in hospitality, what if she offered a social class in interviewing, service, hospitality, courtesy, speech, writing, completing an application, meet & greet etiquette, etiquette, dressing for success? What if she contacted the local elementary, middle, or high school counselors to coordinate a space for hospitality skills or offered her ministry of presence on a career day? What if the church promoted a special 1.5 hour hospitality workshop with her as the headliner for parents and their students at a meet and greet with her and list her credentials in the hospitality industry? She’s a woman of faith and highly successful in her field. What a gift to share these skills with students preparing to make their way in the world through a filter of faith in Jesus!

She shared that her husband is a musician. What if he offered introductory music lessons as a group where he could share a Bible story or a simple reading from a children’s Bible of the many ways music is spoken of in the scriptures? 

There are so many opportunities for children and their families to be welcomed on a church campus besides Sunday morning to begin relationships and live out, “We are your good neighbor, we want to help you along your way.” 

We are not event planners nor are we event venues, so we must insist on intentional faith formation elements which are developmentally appropriate. We won’t miss the opportunity for faith formation when someone from the church family welcomes, hosts, and leads.  We can be good neighbors and give real testimony to the goodness of God by making our presence known and sharing the skills and gifts of our church family with our community. 

What if we became places where the community learns about Jesus as they learn to bake bread, budget, shop, change a tire, talk car parts, use power tools, how to be a grill master, and garden/grow stuff out of the dirt? A vegetable garden, a flower garden? What skills does your church family know and then make it a matter of prayer to be willing to share it? All of our church saints are incredibly skilled and experienced in various areas of vocation and accomplishment. What if we figured out what we have in our hands, then put it out there? It’s almost like giving your saints the chance to serve in the mission field without packing a suitcase and they can still sleep in their own beds.

Most church locations have the spaces and resources for these things. Did you know that the likelihood of a girl being taken advantage of goes down to a non-existent level once she learns how to use a power tool? Did you know that good manners can get a young person’s foot in the door faster than anything else? Did you know that the milestones of driving, cooking, budgeting are all elements of service which are not taught in the local schools and most parents don’t even know where to start but are extensions of Biblical hospitality? All of these could be one-and-dones or part of a series over the course of a couple of years. Have a couple, debrief, then edit the next two to excellence based on what you learn works and doesn’t. I’m not talking about a Broadway production, just a space and a Jesus guy/gal who shares their story and His story with a young person.

Rather than say, “We don’t have a ministry to children,” could we say, “We do!” because of God’s people, their skills, and experiences, out of a place of abundance and gratitude for what God has made available and are part of your local church family of faith? Ministry may not look like what we think and that’s what makes it innovative. Nothing needs to look like what we already have in our heads. Let’s invite the Holy Spirit to use what’s in our hands and watch Him show up and show off.

All this could be promoted on Facebook, social media, through the local school, or Eventbrite. Include a time of testimony of sharing the leader’s story of God’s faithfulness, God’s goodness, pray with the participants, and maybe wear a t-shirt with a Christian message or scripture. 

Fleshing out things like this is what we do at the Innovation Summit. The Innovation Summit is three hours of multiple ideas and real stories of moving beyond the sea of Nos to a place of YES, YOU CAN. You will leave with confidence to wonder, negotiate, push the boundaries, and advance the good news of Jesus where you are with what is in your hand. A Zoom option is not available because each Summit is filled with ideation specific to the participants present. 

The next Innovation Summit will be held at Tucker First United Methodist Church located in Tucker, Georgia on Saturday, May 1st 9am-12noon. Register today.

Grandparents hold a special place in the hearts of the grandchildren. It goes both ways. Grandparents are part of God’s continuing plan to grow up disciples of His son Jesus. Take a look at Deuteronomy 6 and Psalm 78 to get a small glimpse of that plan.

We are leveraging that relationship and intentionally helping with a Grandparent’s toolbox to share their faith through a closed Facebook group entitled Faith Grandparenting and four in-person opportunities each year to share stories and resources to help them along their way we call Grandparenting With A Purpose. “You cannot be a Christian family if you are not a disciple-making family, because your family can’t truly follow Christ if you are not doing what Christ commanded – trying to become more and more like Him and leading others to do the same.” (Family Discipleship by Chandler & Griffin)

Last week’s Grandparenting With A Purpose: Holiday Edition, shared in-person and through a Facebook Live event on the closed Faith Grandparenting Facebook group, was a very special time to share life and some great ideas.

We serve a God of celebration! Through festivals, special food, visuals, decorations, and community we stop and remember the faithfulness of God: Passover, Festival of Tabernacles, Feast of Purim, Harvest time, Holy Communion. We celebrate with our five senses with special sights (lights, tablescapes, decorations), smells (food, spaces, candles), sounds (music, words), tastes (food), and touch (clothing, expressions of affection). Traditions offer rhythms for connection and belonging for which we are wired by our Creator.

Holidays like…
Thanksgiving – table cloth with names of who has shared the Thanksgiving table over the years; favorite foods and the magic of the “how” to make it; handwritten recipes and sharing the faith of the ones who started the family recipe.
Christmas – Ask “What three things will make Christmas Christmas?”; three gifts (Magi)
New Year’s – Do overs; time capsules; goals for physical, spiritual, family faith experiences.
Mardi Gras – Looking for the baby (Baby Jesus) in a King Cake; masks (God knows all of our mysteries).
Valentine’s Day – The greatest love story in all the world is John 3:16.
St. Patrick’s Day – story of St. Patrick; the color green reminds us to ‘grow in our faith’ continually and discussion of how we will do that this spring.
Independence Day – visit patriotic/historic places and share the stories of the faith of our founding mothers (Harriett Tubman, Abigail Adams, Susanna Wesley) and Christian heritage (John & Charles Wesley, George Washington Carver, Jimmy Carter).

Milestones like…
Birthdays teach our kids to celebrate others. On #1 Son’s 16th birthday we collected gifts of tools from Godly men who wrote him notes of wisdom for the tool they gifted. On Baby Girl’s 16th birthday we collected letters of wisdom from Godly women, teachers, and local officials we knew who knew Jesus and compiled a ‘Book of Wisdom’ she carries with her to this day.
Anniversaries teach kids to revisit big family moments. We will share that #1 Son and his lovely wife went to church for worship on their first date after greeting her at the end of the preschool Sunday school class she was teaching.
Spiritual Birthdays – annual celebrations of making their decision to follow Jesus with a gift, donuts (life without Jesus is like a hole in the middle of your heart), balloons (God is round about His people), they tell their faith story of when they decided to follow Jesus and how they’ve grown in the last year as we prepared a plan to move forward in the next year.
Gotcha Day – celebrating when an adoption came through to become part of the family.
Driver’s License – hold a ‘blessing of the license’; laying on of hands and speaking truth of this new responsibility.
New Home – praying through each room before moving in; a New Year’s home blessing.

Moments like….
Rediscovering the wonder of the everyday – my granddaughter remembers me when she smells biscuits and bacon.
Time to linger – breathe & sip; chill & chat
Gifts of time – my step mother checked me out of high school just to take me to lunch and we talk about the great issues of my teenage life.
Gifts of words – handwritten notes; postcards; journals; recipes; scribe the scriptures; gift a Bible.
New skills – teach about tea; take a cooking class, power tool class; shadow a church saint (Baby Girl shadowed an ER nurse from her home church to discover if nursing was really what God was calling her to. It WAS!)

For those in-person, they enjoyed an ice breaker with The Visual Faith Project, took home confetti cannons and their own Share the Love Drive-thru bags of goodies we’d prepared for our Children’s Ministry drive-thru that had taken place the Sunday afternoon before.

If the average age of a first-time grandparent in the USA is 47, this is a demographic who is leaning into Christian Grandparenting with tenacity. These are amazing disciple-makers and I want to be on their team.

How else can you build up your grandparents with a purpose of intentionally sharing their faith with their grandchildren?

“We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, His power, and the wonders He has done.” Psalm 78:4

Listen to this and other posts on the In The Trenches with DeDe Reilly podcast.

Dallas Willard once said, “Every church ought to ask two questions. What is our plan for making disciples, and is that plan working?”

A plan for making disciples of Jesus is a discipleship plan. As I’m responsible in the local church for students kindergarten through fifth grade, and at home as a parent and grandparent to be a disciple-maker, there are certain skills which must be at the core. These skills should be taught and caught by teaching, practice, and multiple developmentally appropriate experiences over time, in moments, and as milestones.

We call these skills ‘holy habits’ because they are not one-and-dones, but rather repeated as habits. We introduce each one specifically as a Faith Milestone.

Prayer – talking and listening to our great God both by ourselves and in Christian community. This holy habit is practiced individually and in community.

Bible reading/study – God speaks to His people with language to know His heart, His expectations, His love, and His plan for all people whom He created in His own image in The Bible. This holy habit is practiced individually and in community.

Generosity – everything belongs to God and He invites us to accept His gift of salvation through His son Jesus. In response to God’s generosity, we generously bring His goodness into the world through service, giving, and thinking of others before ourselves. This holy habit is practiced individually and in community.

We don’t list worship as a skill because we teach that everything we do which tells Jesus, “I love you!” is worship. Everything! … practiced individually and in community. 

Just this last week we offered the faith milestone entitled, I Can Pray. It’s a faith milestone specifically for 1st and 2nd graders. Each little person attends with a big person. We believe what they experience with someone they love and is involved in their everyday life is much more sticky than just attending an event as an individual. Again, we are better disciples in community.

We set up various prayer stations outside using various prayer tools which each student collects to take home. Each little and their big learn together. They practice together. They take the tool home now knowing what to do with it to help them pray to our great God who hears the prayers of His people, especially little people.

Outdoor stations this year included anointing oil, sidewalk chalk, fidget spinners, a yoga mat, dissolving paper, a picture of Jesus, praying with crayons, playdoh, and a journal.

We teach that prayer is both talking and listening to God. When we pray ‘in Jesus’ name’ we claim “Yes! I believe this is true because of Jesus.” The words we use to pray are special to God. AMEN means “truly”, “indeed”, and “so be it.” The prophet  Isaiah refers to God as “God of the Amen” or truth (Isaiah 65:16) AMEN might be the most widely known word in the world, because even disciples of Jesus in other parts of the world like China, Japan, Brazil, Nigeria, and Spain, who speak various languages, also close their prayers with AMEN. 

Jesus used AMEN at the beginning of His teachings more than 70 times in the New Testament. Each time Jesus started with ‘truly’ or “verily”, He was going to speak truth and He wanted all of His disciples to know it. We say AMEN at the end of a prayer. Jesus said it at the beginning of His teachings because Jesus is the way, the TRUTH, and the life and no one comes to Father except through Him.

There are many other holy habits and we teach those, as well. These are the three we spend a lot of time on because these are foundations of a growing faith in Jesus and these are the holy habits which Jesus did, both individually and in community. The research also reports that these three practices are the most influential in a Christian making strides in their faith and belief in Christ. 

“Churches that have a clear path into discipleship…that get people engaging their faith or at least experiencing it, will see greater success than churches that invite you to merely attend.” Carey Nieuwhof, 5 Post Pandemic Church Grow Accelerators

May we be found faithful to equip our littles with the skills to grow in wisdom, and in stature, and in favor with God and man on an intentional pathway to following Jesus so that they know what it looks like to love the Lord our God with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength and love their neighbor as themselves for their whole lives.

“This is what the Lord Almighty says, ‘Give careful thought to your ways.'” Haggai 1:7

It is the call on every Christian to be Jesus-disciple-makers. Parents and grandparents are on the frontline of Jesus-disciple-making, yet where do they start? How do they fit in one more thing among laundry, grocery-shopping, school, extracurricular, and dentist appointments? This is where we come in, the local church family ministry champions, to lock elbows, share prayer space, and resource families to bring Jesus into what they are already doing.

There wasn’t near as much out there to help Christian families navigate discipling their families in the 1990s. As a young mom I recall four books which, partnered with the Bible and my local church, helped me most along my way:
Tim Keller’s Little House on the Freeway: Help for the Hurried Home
Lisa Whelchel’s Creative Correction
Kevin Leman’s Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours
Mom, You’re Incredible (white book with teal MOM on the cover and have no idea who wrote it, but it was a game-changer!) Do you sense a theme?

Today there are so many options and not near enough time for parents to curate the best, the most practical to help them as they are in the trenches of everyday. Let’s face it, there is just too much information at the end of our fingertips to go deep into anything so they are overwhelmed and just too tired. Again, this is where we come in.

I just finished the best 163 pages I’ve read this year for equipping those devoted to discipling their own families. Matt Chandler and Adam Griffin of The Village Church offer in Family Discipleship: Leading Your Home Through Time, Moments, & Milestones a practical framework of bringing Jesus into what most families are already doing in all seasons of a child’s life.

Published in August 2020, this resource provides today’s family leaders with the sigh of relief that not all family discipleship practices are enjoyed; some are endured. But, ‘our role is to plant seeds of truth, water them, and pray that God will give them life and growth as we trust in his goodness and mercy over all our shortcomings.’ (pg 21)

“You cannot be a Christian family if you are not a disciple-making family, because your family can’t truly follow Christ if you are not doing what Christ commanded – trying to become more and more like him and leading others to do the same.” (pg 30)

In the community of family, we learn best to prepare meals, serve one another, establish rules for living, protect ourselves from dangers, celebrate, and practice academic and social skills. We also learn to become more like Jesus in this community together through time (thinking about, talking about, and living out the good news of Jesus in holy habits), moments (leveraging those daily moments of life which are developmentally appropriate), and milestones (marking and making the remarkable moments of life wrapped in God’s presence and faithfulness to His people.) Each chapter offers the author’s experiences and time plans for those of us who like lists and boxes to fill in.

Time: Rather than thinking everything should be a Broadway production, lower your expectations and think about the positive, cumulative effect of holy habits over time such as Bible reading, devotional time, scripture memory, meals, prayer, worship, and service and how modeling that behavior in the adult’s life is the best teacher.
“A child disciple of Jesus Christ is a child who loves God, loves people, and imparts what God has revealed to them to others. You love what you know.” (pg 43)

Moments: Being attentive and alert to opportunities to talk about the attributes of God, foundational truths about who God is and who they are, and how God’s word is a treasure to explore and discover. As a teacher and family discipleship coach, my favorite pages were pages 122-130…so rich in practicality and narrowing down the spiritual building blocks for living as an exile in today’s culture.

Milestones: Acknowledging God’s work and faithful presence in the remarkable moments of life like births, death, losses, disappointments, driver’s licenses, graduations, starts and ends of school years, heirlooms, new homes, etc. It is in the milestones where there is a ‘tremendous opportunity to extend the discipleship process to your child’s extended family, friends, neighbors, and biblical community’ (pg 136). There are pages of examples at the end of this chapter to simply make events that are already happening spiritually memorable.

As leaders for ministry with families in the local church, we are neither event planners nor community center coordinators. We are family discipleship coaches! D6 Family Ministry shared in a December meme for the local church champions in ministry with children and families: “Good equippers do it like Jesus did it; recruit twelve, graduate eleven, and focus on three.” So glad I have a new calendar with all that white space.

“I rejoiced greatly to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as we were commanded by the Father.” 2 John 4

Listen to this blog on the In The Trenches Podcast with DeDe Reilly here.

Ephesians 4:11-12 calls the local church to ‘equip His people for works of service, SO THAT (emphasis mine) the body of Christ may be built up.’ Ministry leads do not manage volunteers; we equip the saints for good works of service. We have the privilege of inviting God’s people into His call on every believer’s life: to share the gospel and use their gifts and skills to share that gospel.

We are invited to provide an environment where people can practice their skills and gifts to share the gospel in their world. To do so, we build relationships of trust in the areas of…

Information
• God’s people should be able to trust the systems in place so they are each super successful. I ask myself, “Will my siblings in Christ have such a great experience with the systems in place, they will want to continue to grow in their service to God’s people”?
• They should be able to trust the resources and schedule will be provided in a timely manner for them to be successful.
• They should be able to trust the vocabulary used to communicate information will be consistent with the vocabulary of the local culture. The first thing Jesus did when he called his disciples was to teach them. 1 Timothy 4:6 reads, “Be trained in the words of the faith.” 

Connection
• Walt Disney said, “Everything we do tells a story.” I say that, “Everything our servant leaders do tells God’s story as part of their story.” Connections through relationship, not meetings, invite people to see God’s working in their lives.
• They should be able to trust in my leadership reputation: planner, honest, cheerleader, speak well of them, honor my family/spouse/children, even-tempered, joyful. Do they enjoy being around me, do I help them listen to their Holy Spirit and give them earned-freedoms in programming? Am I accessible/available/honorable/helpful/kind? Do I model a disciple of Jesus to the best of my ability? Am I a prayer warrior or an event planner?
• Co-lead a Bible study, be faithful to a small group of fellow disciples, growing in my own personal discipleship.

Inspiration
• Most ministry takes place not in programming, but in being present where the disciples are: worship services, other ministry special events, and asking, “Where can I help?” Oswald Chambers wrote, “A call is always preceded by a need.” Beth Moore wrote, “Until you know what you’re called to do, do what you are NEEDED to do.” (Entrusted). No, you can’t do everything, but you can do some things easily well, like be present where folks have access to you in Christian community.
• In Ministry Architects’ Sustainable Children’s Ministry leads do well in recruiting if they (1) pray, (2) start early, (3) identify matches (not just fill a hole set my me, but rather ask myself ‘what’s in my hands?’), (4) make a list, and (5) make contact. The best way to make contact is to be where people are (refer to the bullet point above).
• What if we tithed 10% of our time each week in growing our relationships with the people we are called to equip? We can do this by phone, ministry of presence, text, email, social media, etc. No ulterior motive, but by asking, “How can we share life so well as disciples of Jesus that we both are growing our faith together?”

Celebration
• Share in the remarkable moments of life, not just the spiritual milestones of what takes place inside the walls, but rather inside their hearts.
• There are five love languages, and four languages of appreciation in the workplace. When I taught weekday preschool I told the parents, “My first goal for the first week is to find out (1) What makes your child tick, and (2) What ticks them off.” Adults are like that, too. Be a student of your servant leaders, not just the manager.

The goal of leading a team of servant leaders is to equip God’s people for works of service. The whipped cream? To make their experience such a good experience that ‘surely goodness and mercy will follow us all the days of our lives’ SO THAT WE ALL dwell in the house of the Lord … together … forever. Amen.

How can you provide a better experience in your environment to equip God’s people for works of service? 

“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ, Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10

Recruiting and family engagement has taken on a whole new level of relationship-building. Or has it? Motivated by a spirit of compassion, love, ‘we are still in this together’, and a respect of how each person will live out their call to love the Lord their God with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength, AND love their neighbors as themselves, we proposed a Chill & Chat About McEachern Kids (MK).

Promotional Vocabulary: Children learn best to love Jesus by spending time with people who love Jesus. That’s you! McEachern Kids Dream Team’s training with Tropical Cafe’ smoothies will be on Wednesday, July 22 5:30pm-7pm.
Bring your camp chair and we’ll gather at the McEachern Kids entrance to CHILL & CHAT about the many different opportunities to serve Jesus on the McEachern Kids leadership team and have some fun.
This is for you if you’re all in, if you want to get more connected, and even if you’re just curious and unsure of making the commitment to serve when we open our doors to in-person gathering in The Treehouse.
For more information, contact dreilly@mceachernumc.org.
RSVP at…

We ordered Sunrise smoothies from the local Tropical Smoothie and with camp chair in-hand, we set up outside with appropriate social distancing. Everyone got a smoothie, a pen, a copy of the calendar hot off the presses, and an index card. The index card was to write notes to me of thoughts, ideas, concerns, dreams for MK. Earlier in the day I’d sent a text to everyone in my phone asking a set of 3+3 questions: What 3 things do you LOVE about MK? What 3 things do you WISH for MK? Our new senior pastor had asked these same questions of the staff as part of his on-boarding. My phone blew up all day with responses. Those who couldn’t respond by text and those who popped in out of mere curiosity were able to follow up with emails to the 3+3 later or write them on the index card and leave the cards in a basket for me to review after the meeting.

I’d asked two servant leaders to take notes and one to take pictures.

We chatted about small groups and tossed ideas onto the table for returning to in-person children’s programming beginning on Labor Day Sunday. We chatted about looking into the next 2.5 years. We chatted about Faith Milestones, Parenting with a Purpose classes, why we chose how we did Drive-in and Drive-thru, Christmas Eve children’s services, what CLUB345 and GLEE Club could look like. I shared stories of why we would start Grandparenting with a Purpose classes and what Camp Chair Meetings to come in September and October will look like. This team is the first to hear about Camp Chair Meetings so I needed to be clear and begin stirring much energy as they are the connectors to spread the word much better than a social media campaign could ever do. We took a tour of the Children’s Ministry spaces inside the building for the first-timers and first-lookers explaining the staging chaos for Drive-in services with the Ambassadors present telling their stories of the spaces and taking pics. “This is my favorite supply closet. This is where Ms. DeDe stores the snacks and especially the Rice Krispie Treats!,” shared by the fabulous Miss Olivia who started as an Ambassador and is now an MK intern. 

Then the ask: Would you prayerfully consider serving on the McEachern Kids servant leader team next year?

Let’s get this party started!

“Go ahead, then, and complete what your ancestors started!” Matthew 23:32

Overwhelmed with information? Overwhelmed with learning new things? Overwhelmed with taking care of your own family while reaching out to your church families? Overwhelmed teachers, students, parents, grandparents, WalMart grocery lists? We are only one week in on an unprecedented deep dive into the creativity pool to maintain connection with our church families as we also work to keep our own families safe, secure, taught, busy, occupied, calm, fearless, awake, and off the television or electronics 24/7. How are you doing? Oh, and it’s raining!

Pace yourself.

Every day last week from dawn until late in the evening, I felt my phone was connected to me like an IV drip. Gathering information takes time. Learning new platforms takes time. Reaching out by phone to every single amazing volunteer and a ton of students takes time. Purging closets for what can be bagged and tagged to share in a Family Faith Kit drive-thru for every Tuesday for 8 weeks takes time. There is a difference between digital marketing and social media. There is a difference between online announcements and online engagement. Social media and online engagement take time.

Pace yourself.

Others will make suggestions of what you should do. Others will compare you to the church down the street with a technical staff, IT ninjas, and a collaborative team. You will feel there aren’t enough hours in the day. You will wish you could do everything and anything. We’re all living with new routines, new structures (or no structures), new schedules (or no schedules). Ministry with children and families is so much more than Sunday morning services….it’s daily….it’s nightly…it’s during the remarkable moments and milestones of life. Birthdays, weddings, and sudden-though-celebratory home-comings-to-Jesus keep happening.

Pace yourself.

What was I reminded of in last week’s many webinars and phone calls?

• Remember your WHY.
• Ministry is still about relationships.
• Children’s ministry is still about partnering with parents and servant-leaders so THEY are the spiritual rock stars in their kid’s eyes and hearts.
• How are you asking, “How are you doing?” “How can I pray for you?”
  
  Pace yourself.
  
  Make a schedule of what is realistic for you with some easy wins. Try something new, but not everything. Keep it simple. Keep it real for you and your families. I will make it a point of not adding to the noise for my families. My heart’s desire has always been for my parents to take the primary role of spiritually leading their kids. My role is to resource them, giving them easy wins. You don’t want to be on the other side of this and need a vacation. This could be short. This could be a while. Be fair to yourself. Keep healthy boundaries and don’t get sucked into your own unrealistic expectations for yourself. YOU and YOUR FAMILY are your first ministry. 
  
  Pace yourself.
  
  “Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.” James 1:12