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Monthly Archives: June 2020

What the Photos Don’t Show

30 Tuesday Jun 2020

Posted by DeDe Bull Reilly in Uncategorized

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If you were to just look at the pictures of last week’s drive-in service which offered stations rather than a ‘park & stay’ it’ll look like we didn’t follow the rules or protocols, but we did. It’ll look like kids were on top of each other, but they weren’t. It’ll look like we had kids and cars moving at the same time, but our parking lot guards (and we had lots of them) blocked off with orange barrels and their own vehicles to be sure even how vehicles parked were the safest way possible for little people. It’ll look like kids and adults were everywhere, but entire families ran the stations, so there are kids under the tents and on the other side of the yarn tied as a boundary around three sides (which look invisible in the pictures) to keep others outside the tents for proper social distancing. We only used tables for one station offering more distance and that station leader wore a mask.

We painted the parking lot with watered down tempera (which fully washed off after the second rain the following week, but I wished it didn’t because it took more than three hours to put it there and it was awesome.) We used glass rather than plastic coca-cola bottles for the science experiments, because they were cheaper and heavier to stay upright on the ground. We used salad spinners for the spin art, but wiped off each spinner with Lysol wipes after every child touched them along with the pool noodles for the water balloon station. There were Lysol wipes (stocked-piled and provided by a generous family) at every station and used after every child touched anything. Some kids, parents, and grands wore masks, but most didn’t. The station leaders basically ‘restocked and chatted a few steps back’ as each station was kid-directed rather than leader-directed. There was a dog…it’s a therapy dog.

There was so much that took place at the last ‘Jesus is different so we are different’ drive-in service which could never be seen by a photo:

  • Space for parents/grandparents to verbally process in community the public announcement made that very morning about county schooling choices for the upcoming year.
  • Space for me to greet each family with, “How was your last week?” and hear that a mom’s dad had a stroke and this is one time each week they can forget what’s happening in the world and just play.
  • Space for some parents to just be dad or mom and not wear their vocational uniform which makes being in public with their family uncomfortable.
  • Space for a mom to share her story of the challenge of celebrating Father’s Day when the typical dad is not present, which I would’ve never known.
  • Space for dads to chat with other dads about college football and car troubles and super-soakers and for families to invite their cousins and their grandparents.
  • Space for other kidmin leaders to bring a family’s kids from her church to give a set of parents a desperately needed break.
  • Space for boys and girls to be rough…and loud….and messy…and soaked…and laugh.
  • Space for five new families to come who probably heard about it through the Food Share line on Fridays or MUST summer lunch program on Wednesdays without being interrogated with, “How did you hear about us?”, but rather, “Hi! My name is DeDe. Tell me about your family.” #dignity 

The photos won’t show any of this, so please refrain from making assumptions. The other thing you won’t see by the photos? The capes worn by every leader and every parent/grandparent present because these are the superheroes in our kid’s lives pointing them to Jesus every single day.

“Courage gives us a voice and compassion gives us an ear. Without both, there is no opportunity for empathy and connection.” Brene’ Brown

Family Drive-in Church: Editing To Excellence

23 Tuesday Jun 2020

Posted by DeDe Bull Reilly in Uncategorized

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Not wanting our families to grow accustomed to doing life without one another, we find Thursday night drive-in church the sacred space to nurture those and new relationships. Guidelines were provided by our denominational leaders. We’re a few weeks in and plan to offer these weekly memorable experiences throughout June, July, and August. This is drive-in church for kids with adults in the vehicle, not drive-in church for adults with kids in the vehicle. Each week finds us in edit-to-excellence mode and this is what we’re learning:

Keep the service short
Keep the services at twenty minutes. Families arrive up to ten minutes early to get settled. Families are lingering after the services especially if the weather is fantastic. One of the goals of the services is to offer space and time for re-connection, yet we need to make way for the next wave of service families and remain deeply hospitable. Stick with the most important holy habits to share in this season with most of the activity taking place in the vehicle: game, prayer, Bible reading, and music. Twenty minutes is the limit.

Intentional visual memories
Children recall memories in visual form accentuated by how they feel. Use a lot of beach balls, make big foam board pizza and walk it around. Bubble machines and balloons in clusters. Music with masked dancers and use the church’s choir robes, decorate you with the theme or a tutu or a chef’s jacket. Bring out a huge measuring tape to stay mindful of six-feet-apart in a humorous way. Name tags are good for inside the building, but what does a greater visual look like to recognize who the leaders are? We had black aprons made with our logo embroidered largely on the chest so it can be seen from far away. We’ll use these when we return to inside-the-building children’s programming as well for visual hospitality moments since we won’t be able to high-five, hug, or be physical. We’ve also ordered some handheld signs to use to transition from the parking lot to inside the building. Already looking down the road at what can we bridge from outside the building to inside the building when we can return to inside programming.

Introduce yourself
Whoever is speaking, introduce yourself. Not everyone will know who you are. Say your name and speak of your family as who is connected to you. It’ll build connection between you and the families in your audience. Add a story of what your family did the last week that relates to the service theme: cooking theme/your family’s favorite pizza, then turn it around to a discussion prompt for each vehicle. We have a young man as our one of our emcees who grew up in our church as a kid. When he introduces himself, he speaks of his family and how his family members share the love of Jesus in the world and in our church: His Dad leads an adult Sunday School, his sister served in the Asian mission field, his Mom is a super servant on our Children’s Ministry Dream Team. I overheard a conversation between several older elementary students share, “We could do this one day when we grow up!” (Insert hand on heart here!)

Incorporate elements of what our kids did inside the building
Our students presented the Apostle’s Creed and the Gloria Patri in American Sign Language in our traditional service pre-Covid. We lead one or the other each week just before the Bible reading. Our Ambassadors who are serving on the parking lot team get to be the visual leaders of this. They do this best! We introduce this with a shout of three times of “Christians, what do you believe?” or “Followers of Jesus, what do you believe?” These amazing Ambassadors hold a sign which reads, “Flash your lights if this is your first time!” Since their families are the traffic team, we position these ambassadors nearest the first time vehicles for the kids in those cars to want to learn the signs to these elements that may not be familiar. Kids want to do what other, older kids are doing. 

Leverage what you know kids like
Knowing kids like to get things, kids like to pop balloons, and kids don’t like waiting to do something but will wait since it builds excitement. Investing in a Ryobi Inflater/Deflater, we blow up balloons most weeks with a rolled up piece of paper with the scripture location. Each kid gets a balloon and a registration form when they drive on the lot, but can’t pop the balloon until later in the service. Needing to capture contact information, each kid gets a take-away from each service AFTER they fly a paper airplane made from the registration form (they fold and fly it from their vehicle) into a kiddie pool. Take-aways include bags of popcorn (we say when we toss them into the car window, “Thanks for popping in!”), star bubble rods, cold Smart Water and Gatorade for our VIPs (Very Important People: Dads & GrandDads & Uncles & Spiritual Dads) for the Thursday before Father’s Day), helium balloons to be tied onto mailboxes of church shut-ins and saints as they leave to ‘spread the joy’ after the Psalm 100 service.)

We are learning something new each week. Stay tuned!

“I am carrying on a great project and I cannot go down.” Nehemiah 6:3

We Are All New Church Starts

16 Tuesday Jun 2020

Posted by DeDe Bull Reilly in Uncategorized

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In this in-between time I’ve taken classes, read books, watched webinars, talked with people from all over the country in preparation for whatever the Lord offers us so that we point our families to Jesus. That is where we are. All of us. We are all new-church-starts. Our personal and professional worlds will continue to look different for the foreseeable future. I quickly stopped lamenting what was lost by the end of March and was thrilled at the overwhelming invite from the Holy Spirit to do His work better for this unprecedented future.

I learned that however we are connecting with our faith families, each platform for connection (not just content), is a community. If we are connecting disciples of Jesus online, we have an online community. If we are connecting disciples of Jesus through the drive-thru, we have a drive-thru community. We leveraged the drive-thru community to go the next step and began the weekly kid’s drive-in service. If we are connecting disciples of Jesus with one another through drive-in church, we now have a drive-in community. I’m not talking about separate churches, but rather different, specific communities within the same church body. There is definitely some overlap, but each is a distinct community.

If this is so, I’ve decided to look at the closed children’s ministry Facebook group as one community requiring connection and engagement AND the drive-in families as another community requiring connection and engagement. Think two faith communities, still one church.

My home church started two new churches. Home-church folks were invited to gather, train, and pray themselves together to serve as the leadership of a new family of faith and go to a new community. They committed to a period of time together to be the core to start the new church, share life, practice the holy habits of service, worship, prayer, generosity, small groups, and equip the new disciples to live as followers of Jesus in the new community, then return to the home church or stay with the new family of faith once their time was done. They were the core disciple-makers until they could equip the new disciples to become disciple-makers. Keep this model in mind and you know where I’m headed…

With these two new communities (online and drive-in) I’ve enlisted the help of several disciple-makers within the ‘home church’ to help build relationship and engagement in each community. Though there is great overlap between the two new communities, there are some very distinct ways to connect and build relationships specific to each.

Online – There are several faithful disciple-makers who are all over social media. They know the language to affirm and engage in online conversations easily. With the goal of the FB group posts to roll in feeds regularly, we need regular and faithful engagement and it can’t just be me. How can we build relationships within this community? Last Wednesday I scheduled a post to celebrate National Iced Tea Day. One of these amazing online disciple-makers posted in the comments, “Sweet or Unsweet? I prefer unsweet myself and people think I’m crazy.” Within a couple of hours there were 47 comments. We have 285 members in this closed Facebook group. That’s engagement! Not digital marketing, but digital engagement within an online community. We have three home-church disciple-makers who make sure folks are having a great time online.

Each week we offer themes for this very purpose: joke week, either/or week, share week, prayer week, and we ask questions of our ‘online family’ several times each day. Summer engagement is different than school-year and with the average person on social media 144 minutes each day, post-COVID must be intentional. We’ve learned where people can find the best vegetables (42 comments), favorite place to go hiking (39 comments), why they choose Zaxby’s over KFC (75 comments), which book of the Bible rocked their world (31 comments), and which Chick-Fil-A sauce is their favorite (90 comments). Learning some holy habits through images and godly parenting blog posts, we are equipping them to point their kids to Jesus in a way that is simple, kid-friendly, and a regular part of life, as well as getting to know one another through sharing life online where we are…online community.

Drive-In – Each Thursday we are offering three separate 20-minute services for our kids with their families. We offer song, dance, car chats, and games, but the parents/grandparents are the directors and leaders in their vehicle. This community is seeing one another, laughing together, sharing memories, and making plans together to attend. Engagement with this community continues to grow as we’re face-to-face (kinda, but not really) and find ourselves sharing an experience together. We need to communicate in ways which are intentionally kid-friendly, outlandish, and over-the-top through the five senses of sight, sound, taste, smell, and touch. Our music is kid-friendly but has lyrics of songs their parents know because we want everyone to feel “I belong here”. We learn some holy habits through sensory experiences equipping parents and grandparents to point their kids to Jesus in a way that is simple, kid-friendly, and a regular part of life. Getting to know one another and sharing life where we are…in the parking lot.

Those home-church disciple-makers serving in hospitality for the drive-in are entire families, especially our parking/traffic team. At the first drive-in we heard from our parking/traffic team that several drivers asked if some of the people were there, by name, who they connected with online. They were! The parking leaders then connected the folks who had only connected online before…and their conversations continued, although yelling in the parking lot to safely social distance. It was awesome and hilarious. THAT’s community!

How are you engaging in ALL of your given communities, getting to know one another and sharing life where you are with your families? This is the world new church starts live in, as do we.

“But they went out and spread the news about him all over that region.” – Matthew 9:31

A Drive-in Church For Kids

09 Tuesday Jun 2020

Posted by DeDe Bull Reilly in Uncategorized

≈ 5 Comments

Because of the COVID19 safety restrictions, we have shifted faith formation for little people from inside the building this summer to the parking lot. Children remain in their vehicles to celebrate Jesus as a family.

I’d spoken with many churches doing drive-in church well for their adults knowing there were children in the vehicles. We wanted to do drive-in church well for kids knowing their adults were in the vehicles. Considerations were multi-sensory, hands-on, all-skate, Bible reading, give tools and practice for family prayer, car-chat discussion, games, a noisy offering response, kid-friendly contact collection, follow-up, a sound system, smooth traffic flow, a take-away, aimed at an audience of 3rd grade boys, 20 minutes, Jesus content, leave ‘em smiling. Three services at 6pm (1st grade & younger), 7pm (2nd & 3rd graders), 8pm (4th & 5th graders). If a family has multiples, they pick their service.

We shifted to a different location due to rain at the start of the first service. By the third service we were blessed with a rainbow in the sky. God’s goodness was waiting for us. The volunteers close to the vehicles were masked and gloved. We used our current Sunday school curriculum as the starting point for planning.

Hospitality – Colorful signs and familiar Sunday school music as they arrive and park.

Welcome – Each kid gets a registration form and black balloon at arrival to pop later. Inside each balloon is a piece of paper with the scripture inside. Registration form asks for family name, how many in the car, email address. Kids fold it into a paper airplane to fly at a target at the end of the service in the world’s largest offering plate (kiddie pool).

Game – The Masked Dancer (3 animal masks; choir robes) to Can’t Stop The Feeling.

Song – Taught sign language to Amazing Grace, then played the 2 minute Sunday school music to do the signs together.

Game – God created our bodies so let’s play Simon Says and see how well your body works (air guitar, lift legs as high as you can, hug yourself, hug your family, pat your head, kiss your tummy, touch your nose with your tongue, etc.)

Pop the balloon – Find out where to look in your Bible, Psalm 139.

Pray in song – O Be Careful Little Eyes What You See.

Bigs read Psalm 139:1-14 – Psalm 139 was written by David and known as a man after God’s own heart. David wrote people are wonderfully made because of who made us: God! Share the story of how Milk Duds got its name. We are not duds, we are wonderfully made by a wonderfully, perfect, and loving God.

Car Chat – We learn that God is our creator and He sees our thoughts and actions. Is that a good thing? Do we really want God to see us all the time? Does God know you? How does it feel to know that God created you? (Leave space in-between each question.)

Personal Testimony – The things God made about us were made that way for a reason. I shared about my Dad’s big voice. I have that same big voice because God knew one day that I’d need a big voice to tell kids about Jesus. Even the things you might not like about yourself can be part of God’s purpose for you and He can use it so you can tell others about Jesus.

Closing Prayer – Hand-stack prayer: everyone in the vehicle stacks hands on top of each other. The person whose hand is at the bottom of the stack goes first, praying a single sentence prayer as they pull out his hand and place it on top of the hand stack. Then, the next person prays and pulls her hand out and places it on top of the stack until everyone gets to pray aloud then all close with AMEN.

Leaving activity – Receive offering and fly the registration form paper airplanes into the kiddie pools carried around the parking lot. Kids get small boxes of Milk Duds tossed into the vehicles from someone who is gloved.

Lessons learned to put into place next week – Each person who speaks introduces themselves (not everyone in the vehicle will know us); wireless mic for the speaker rather than a hand-held to facilitate greater movement; pray for no rain so we can use the larger space and all can see the speaker when necessary.

We plan for each week to look differently and the experience to be different. Example: emcee added to week #2; drive-in stations for each vehicle on week #4; send-out station at the end on week #3; end with a drive-thru pool party and water on week #4.

Text messages were sent and received on Sunday from the big people of several upper elementary boys sharing what their boys remembered and enjoyed at the service so we know what to focus on next week as most memorable. The hand-written follow-up postcards were mailed out the following Monday to mailing addresses as a thank you for coming and an invite to come back followed with an email reminder for the next Thursday to go out on Wednesday morning. If no address is known, we will contact by email to introduce ourselves and make connection the next day. Content is not king. Connection is king. It’s all about the growing of our relationships. This was a natural next-step in discipleship for those who came to know us at the drive-thru. 

Jeff Henderson is an entrepreneur, speaker, pastor, business leader, and author of Know What You’re FOR: A Growth Strategy for Work, An Even Better Strategy for Life. In a recent talk about Three Strategies For Re-entry, he said, “Don’t let your customer grow accustomed to doing life without you.” We don’t have customers; we have disciples of Jesus and we are responsible for one another. We need each other, we’re better together, we’re wired for community, and drive-in church on Thursday evenings this summer will allow us to continue to safely do life together with littles and their bigs.

The biggest win? The big people in the lives of our little people are the heroes here. These bigs are leading their kids/grandkids to keep their eyes on Jesus and their eyes out for other people. We are just providing the setting and the sacred space. 

“I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.” 1 Corinthians 9:23

KidMin Construction Site

02 Tuesday Jun 2020

Posted by DeDe Bull Reilly in Uncategorized

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My grandson has an obsession with excavators. He’s two. He will play all day digging, moving small and large things with an extractor and a dump truck. Shifting, moving, digging, leaving plenty behind, spilling as he goes. Content to talk it through in two year old vocabulary as he plays, works, thinks. He leaves the area to eat, sleep, and come chat for a while. He always returns to continue the excavating, the dumping, the moving, the spilling.

Ministry with children is shifting.

Shifting from Sunday to every day.

Shifting from facility-based to home-based to as-we-go-based.

Shifting from Bible story lessons to families living their stories every day in every way with their eyes on Jesus and their eyes out for other people.

Building deeper family relationships.

Excavating.

With our shoes off.

Personal.

Unhurried.

Over the long haul.

Over a childhood.

Watch yourselves closely so that you don’t forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. Deuteronomy 4:9

In the New Testament account of Philip and the Ethiopian (Acts 8), we find an apostle following God’s call to, “Go.” Meanwhile, the Ethiopian has gone to worship and is sitting, reading the Word of God on the road as he goes home. Philip ran up to the Ethiopian and asks, “Do you understand what you are reading?” The Ethiopian replies, “How can I, unless someone explains it to me?” So he invites Philip to come up and sit with him. They read the Word together. The Ethiopian asks Philip, “Tell me, please…” Then Philip begins with that very passage of Scripture AND tells him the good news about Jesus.  as they traveled, they came to some water (a next step). When their time together ended, Philip continued to GO and PREACH, while the Ethiopian WENT ON HIS WAY REJOICING.

Can we go?

Can we say discipleship is worship AND a regular diet of reading the scriptures with a guide?

Can we run up to our kids with the Word, then let their guides sit with them?

Can we be ready to be invited into the conversations, but equip the guides?

Can we sit alongside?

Can we just start somewhere?

Can we travel together for a season? Is discipleship a pick up basketball game? Can discipleship be digging, dumping, moving, spilling, set aside for a bit and picked back up?

Can we offer our families the tools to ‘go on their way rejoicing?’

Can we tell them the good news about Jesus?

What has changed?
* 48% of church goers have not participated in online church offerings over the last month.
* Even our regular church-goers are starting to experiment with different faith-formation options for their entire family.

What has not changed?
*Parents are still interested in security and safety.
*Kids learn best through experiences involving all five senses: sight, smell, sound, touch, taste. 
*Kids learn to love Jesus by spending time with people who love Jesus.

What we win them with, we win them to. – Frank Turek, as quoted in Mama Bear Apologetics 

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