When Mr. Bob and I lived in south Louisiana there were so many amazing restaurants we learned we’d cover more ground if we made a special night out like a progressive dinner. We’d stop at one restaurant for sausage gumbo, another for crawfish etouffee’, and still another for bread pudding and cafe’ au lait. The food was a delight, but it was the varied tables and settings along with the travel in-between which added so much more to the meal.

A progressive dinner is an occasion at which the different courses of a meal are eaten at different locations. A progressive dinner invited our 3rd-5th graders to enjoy some intergenerational table-life with each other and their church family for our last gathering of the school year. 

April has Easter and Spring Break. May is December-in-the-spring for our families. The end of March is the last monthly gathering of our 3rd-5th graders for the school year.  If we say we’re partnering with families, we offer them margin in April and May by finishing special, ongoing programming in March.

Progressive Dinner, Sunday March 27th, 3:45-7pm
Start with a 20 minute review at the church of the specific liturgical holidays studied over the school year and how each one reminds us of Jesus. This allows space for review and late-arrivers.
Stick-on name tags with first names let our hosts call the children by names.

Three locations were arranged as follows:
* Appetizer was nearby – various hot and cold (served by young newly weds in their first home)
* Main course was further away from the church – all things taco (served by a parent and their adult Sunday school class)
* Dessert was the furthest away from the church – homemade family recipe of pound cake, cookie bars, and ice cream (served by a couple who’ve been part of the church family for more than 30 years).

At each home we asked our hosts before we ate to tell how they’d come to be part of our church’s family and where they serve at church and in the world. Our hosts then blessed the food and gave instructions. 

Our hosts decided what to serve. I contacted them on Saturday with an attendance estimate. On Sunday I texted an estimated time of arrival and when we were headed their way.

Other details: Water was the beverage of choice. Multiple tables along with some standing space to learn to hold a plate and eat standing up. The party number grew as we progressed to the locations. Our two bus drivers serve as leaders on church committees and looked great in their McEachern Kids’ t-shirts they’d been gifted with at prior events – I didn’t even have to ask, they chose those t-shirts on their own. 

I brought games with us for down time, but we never had time as the conversations were plentiful and the laughter over-the-top. Some parents took us up on our offer to join the ride and they, too, were able to get to know new friends and enjoy some great food. Even our pickiest eaters were delighted.

Lagniappe (extra) delights? Our two bus drivers are granddads and will be talking about driving the children and their families when they gather at their next committee meetings AND our older littles spent time with the Titus 2 men and women of their home church in their homes around their tables. Sticky faith memories for everyone!

If you grew up in the local church, especially a smaller to mid-size local church, what intergenerational experiences do you recall which could be re-introduced in a fresh way with your church family?

“Welcome one another, therefore, just as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God.” Romans 15:7

Two books have me fired up right now.

One Body by Sam Halverson was passed along to me in a stack of books about family ministry. There are almost as many words underlined in blue ink (my signature ink color) than there are black-inked words in the book. I had to rein in my blue ink. Sam is an elder in the United Methodist Church who leads a North Georgia local church with a bent to integrate children and youth into the life of the WHOLE church. He articulately explains the slow fade to silos of the last decades’ church growth model built around charismatic leaders and attractional events. His onramps for youth (and I’ll include children) into the life of the church are not just to look cute and sing a song in worship occasionally, nor just serve a breakfast and set up/take down tables for a big church event. It’s all about time and space to build intergenerational relationships.

Children and youth learn best how to love Jesus and commit to the Christian community by spending time with adults who love Jesus and are committed to Christian community. Where are we guaranteed to be in Christian community? The local church! Sam invites us to look beyond paying a young adult to be our kid’s Christian event coordinator and Christian friend. Rather, let’s empower the director of children and youth ministries to make space and intentional invitation for the intergenerational congregation with onramps to, as we claim in our baptismal vows, so order our lives after the example of Christ that this child, surrounded by steadfast love, may be ESTABLISHED IN THE FAITH AND CONFIRMED AND STRENGTHENED in the way that leads to LIFE ETERNAL. (emphasis mine)

How’s that working for you?

Sam explains that when we hire leaders of family ministry outside the denomination, these leaders don’t know how the denomination views the body of Christ. They certainly don’t have time to include that framework in their first year learning curve of database, community, personalities, and room reservations. They might not know how music should be so diverse as to articulate our faith story and our faith history. 

As Michayla White, CEO of International Network of Children’s Ministry, reminded the church innovators at the 2022 Exponential Conference for church innovators, the Deuteronomy 6 passage we throw at parents all the time is the marching orders of an entire nation (body of believers), to teach God’s commands to the children and talk about them as you go, bind them on your hands, and write them on your doorposts.

How’s that working for you?

Sam does a fabulous job of reporting the obstacles we face, but also the many ways to live into our Christian adoption in our commission to make disciples of all nations (and ages) for the transformation of the world (in it for the long haul). When we live into adoption, some become children and some become parents. All of us!

Which brings me to the second book: Sailboat Church by Joan S. Gray. Joan is a teaching elder living in Atlanta of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.) She explains rowboat churches as doing what they can with the resources they have. A rowboat church dismisses any spiritual realities and functions in the belief that the ultimate responsibility for everything rests on us. Instead, a sailboat church tends to focus not on their own situation, resources, or limitations but rather on discerning God’s unfolding will. They engage in intimate partnership with God, trusting God to provide and do what only God can do.

Sailboat churches train sailors who can navigate their way into God’s will. There is so much good to chew on and live into in this little book, but what jumped off the page was a bit about two things which consistently block God: the need for control and the need for comfort. Adopting a posture of sacrifice, of letting go, in these two areas will go a long way in helping the church set sail. (pg 55)

The struggle to control isn’t with malice, but rather a dismissive and disregard for creatives on the steering crew. Where in your local church is traction tended, taught, and energy happening where organizational goals are being met in creative and sailboat ‘led by the Spirit’ ways? Are those leaders invited to the table for ideation or treated with a pat on the head with a ‘You do you, Boo. We’ve got this’? 

The other element to sacrifice is that of comfort. We all have our personal routines aka taking the summer off, zoning out at staff meetings until I get to talk about my area, having an opinion for every area of the church as the expert on absolutely everything, speaking/guarding things for others so they aren’t uncomfortable, keeping information to myself and not sharing it for the good of the whole body, unopen to negotiation and unwilling to see the value of changing something up for a bit, etc.

Today I choose to come to every table with a spirit of YES and trust God’s provision He’s given everything needed to accomplish the goals He’s set. I want to move to CATCH the wind and in a state of anxious expectation the Holy Spirit is alive and active in our midst. I want to live in a state of risk and imagination for the whole body to proclaim the truth of the gospel to the parish the Lord has called me to serve. And I’m taking people with me to work and power that sailboat as God sees fit because we’re better together, one body, rethinking and pioneering the practices that will invite others on this very uncontrolled and uncomfortable ride. Our great God is trustworthy! Who’s in?

“I look upon all the world as my parish; thus far I mean, than in whatever part of it I am, I judge it meet, right, and my bounden duty to declare, unto all that are willing to hear, the glad tidings of salvation. This is the work which I know God has called me to. And sure I am that His blessing attends it.” – John Wesley

Having served on staff at several local churches there are interesting stories attached to furniture, windows, and land. There is unique vocabulary attached to spaces and places on campus which most people have no idea what you’re talking about, especially those new to the church. This is why we offer I Love My Church, a faith milestone for 1st and 2nd graders and their families. 

This age group are good readers, so they can follow signage inside and outside the buildings on campus to lead us (leaders and parents) to various locations. This age group can articulate and re-share a good story, too. The event covers all of 45 minutes.

I learned early on in family ministry that families will make certain faith training a priority because they are milestones like Confirmation. For this reason we chose very specific holy habits to teach and practice which are developmentally appropriate for each age level. To make it even stickier for our littles, they must attend with a big they love and who loves them. If they do not have a big, we will get them one and we do. The holy habit is important, but an intergenerational relationship with another follower of Jesus  is even more important. A great by-product is that a little attending with a big who loves them will take care of Safe Sanctuary compliance and all class management issues.

We start in the Children’s Welcome Center with a resource for the parents and give a packet with stickers for each little person to keep track of where we’re going. We talk about the difference between a church year (liturgical) calendar (round) and at their home (rectangle). We talk about liturgical colors and names for spaces, then head out to explore.

Our first stop is the original chapel (celebrating 90 years open this upcoming Pentecost Sunday!) and compare what they see with what they’ve seen in the spaces they know: aisle, books, pews, altar rails, organ, piano, choir loft, etc. Then I tell stories I’ve gathered from the saints of the church who were more than happy to supply me with dramatic stories of that space oh so many years ago. Our chapel has been in several movies! We share how it’s used today: weekly prayer groups, bi-lingual worship on Sunday, weddings, funerals, and other remarkable moments of a follower’s life.

We moved on to see the pastor’s office and to my office. We took a fire escape downstairs (an element of surprise) to explore the current sanctuary/worship space. We travel and define words like narthex, vestibule, pew, pulpit, communion table, etc. We read a couple of the honor-plates on furniture and I tell stories. Lots of stories. Lots of exploring and touching and laughing and running about paraments, symbols, and how they all point us to Jesus engaging all five senses.

When we return to the Children’s Welcome Center I ask questions about new spaces, new vocabulary, and the new friends they met. I give out certificates, offer a take-home coloring book, and we take a ‘class photo.’ 

Bonus: While all the littles’ teaching is taking place, their parents are chatting to get to know each other and learning the stories of their church family all along the way. Relationships with their children and age-level in common!

How could you set aside a time to teach of the sacred spaces and places where you lead littles and tell the stories which invite them to belong?

“I will sing of the steadfast love of the Lord, forever; with my mouth I will make known your faithfulness to all generations.” Psalm 89:1

T Shirts are the best advertising you can do for a church. Not only does a t-shirt mark an event, but it also marks you and me telling the world something about you and me.

Oh the possibilities of colors, styles, and even fabrics. My guidelines for t-shirts are to order a size up to make space for fabric choice and cut, a color which is easily washed (not red/black), and white ink because the image or print looks sharp and clean. I don’t typically put a date on a shirt, but I am all about inking tees in the holy scriptures.

As the credits rolled following a great Children’s Pastors Conference online event, the amazing team members were marked with not-your-typical titles. It got me thinking about my team and what titles would make my team smile. A quick search for creative job titles and it got me thinking.

Who on your team would enjoy these titles on a t-shirt?
Head Unicorn Wrangler
Calculating Connoisseur
Creator of Opportunities
Professor of Adventure
Chaos Coordinator
Ringleader
Executive Sherpa
Answer Captain
Soul Shepherd
Video Visionary
Tech Ninja
Messaging Maestro
Chief of Chat
Sitting Ministry Lead
Number Ninja
Vice President of Miscellaneous Stuff
Head of First Impressions
Energy Ambassador
Director of Fun
Chief Inspiration Officer
Happiness Hero
Ambassador of Buzz

I’ve just ordered a 4-pack of lightweight t-shirts from Amazon and will be delivering them to a Jesus gal on my team who has a machine to prepare some t-shirts for this summer’s Food Truck Church season. It’s Dinner Church, but with a Food Truck. Drive-in services in our parking lot for kids with adults in the car every Thursday evening for families.

What would you choose for your t-shirt?

“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Ephesians 2:10

“Thank you for investing in me as a professional Christian educator and as a sister in Christ. Thank you for providing the means and support for continuing education so that we are always serving at our best.” This is the text I sent to some members of our church’s Staff Parish Relations Committee and my supervisor the week I gathered with other professional Christian educators for an online conference I shared with other kidmin leaders.

If ever there was a time to model Christian community and deep dive into learning the best practices for reaching our community for Jesus, this is it. Travel days at the beginning and end of a conference invite us to share how and what we offer the families we serve. We talk about curriculum, special events, and tell stories of God’s faithfulness among our families and our community. We laugh, we snack, we get caught up in one another’s lives in faithful Christian community. We visit sacred spaces along the way. We laugh our heads off. (The picture above is of the Augusta Wesley Foundation’s worship space in downtown Augusta)

We work together to prepare and share meals, we chat about books we’ve read, people we’ve met, and which blogs/podcasts we are gleaning from to be catalysts for organizational health, to be better teachers and team members. We talk ministry in the local church 24/7. Really. 24/7. If we’re awake, we talk about Jesus and how we’re living a disciple’s life. We share struggles. We pray. 

The online conference provides the content and direction of conversations and ideas for how to roll out the best information in our contexts. We push back and wrestle some stuff to the ground. We stay at the table.

When the conference content is finished for the day, it’s time to process what we heard. We take care of our bodies (bike rides and coffee…more table life) and talk through the best of what we can take home to steward the ministry and families to the next level which may prove effective, relevant, developmentally appropriate in partnership with the families and staff team we serve.

So many holy habits practiced (prayer, Bible reading, serving, worship, learning, giving testimony, Christian community) as we model and live a disciple’s life in Christian community alongside other faithful disciples.

At the 2022 Children’s Pastors Conference we chose the online platform offered. CPC+ is presented by the amazing disciples at INCM, International Network of Children’s Ministry.  The online platform was less expensive for registration, housing, and transportation in good budget stewardship this year for several of us in February while other colleagues were able to participate at the in-person event in January. 

We’ve planned a CPC Recap event to share with our family ministry colleagues this week about bummer lambs, evangelism in any environment, tools to invite, incite, and equip families, as well as toolbelt tools to fight spiritual warfare and the differences in offering Bible knowledge and Bible wisdom for littles today. That was just the first day! In-person and online participants will be sharing at the recap hosted by an Alpharetta local church kidmin team for we are better together.

At the Child Discipleship Summit in Charleston two weeks later, we worked in small groups on how and why we must advance our maps for church growth of edu-tainment to the ‘twin cities’ of faithfulness and lasting faith as we fight secularism and teach our kids their truest identity is as a child of God. This room of leaders are pushing the doors and windows to lead littles into a radical pursuit of God, the total annihilation of idols, the resetting of altars in the home, at church, and in the community, wholehearted obedience to God’s Word, and the restoration of redemptive practices. We are missionaries in a land hostile to the things of God! Let’s draw new maps together.

The more I’ve chatted with others about what I’ve learned, the easier it is to bring a lot of great content into chewable pieces to implement and filter in my context. The Lord is setting the table today for what effective discipleship looks like, sounds like, smells like, and feels like in 2030 and beyond. I’ll bring a folding chair to the table the Lord is setting if I have to.

What are you learning? How are you processing what’s coming into your brain and getting lit up by the fire of your Holy Spirit? What’s the barrier for family discipleship in your context? What could be the greatest accelerator for family discipleship? 

“You can hold confetti and kleenex at the same time.” – Michayla White, CEO, INCM, CPC+2022

“Our children will look back on their childhood and find we created a lukewarm church. We’ve been asleep at the wheel.” – Rev. Jon Tyson, Child Discipleship Summit 2022