Faith Milestones are key “firsts” in our spiritual growth, reminding us that faith formation isn’t limited to Sunday mornings. For the past ten years, I’ve made Faith Milestones a central part of our discipleship journey for children with their families.
These milestones, like delightful stepping stones on a path, are customized for each stage of development, from preschool through youth. They mark special moments and developmental markers where the local church and families come together, creating a shared journey of love and devotion to our triune God. Together, we help nurture a love for the Lord that flows into every area of life—within the church, at work, at school, and at home.
Last Sunday, we offered Hard Questions Faith Milestone for 7th and 8th graders, along with an adult who loves them. In 90 minutes, we tried to tackle 28 of the 56 questions from Janine McNally’sUnderstanding Hard Questions: I Need Answers. We had to skip about a dozen questions to ensure we finished on time and wrapped up as planned.
I prepared a Google slide deck with one question per slide and the corresponding page number from the book. Each student and adult received a book and a pen or pencil for note-taking.
We started by sharing our goals:
It’s okay to ask questions.
The answers should make sense, be reasonable, and offer the best explanation that aligns with reality.
We want to want to give God our minds, as in Luke 10:27.
To break up the 90-minute session, we took a five-minute break halfway through and included in the slide deck two videos from Pursue God Kids that answered the questions “Who is God?” and “What is Salvation?” After the last video, we turned to Romans 10:9 to continue the conversation.
We saved the dinosaur questions for last, which was a fun way to end since our first class was all boys.
Middle schoolers have big questions about faith and life. We want their parents, in partnership with their local church, to be their first source for answers and from a Biblical worldview.
What Faith Milestones would you provide for your middle schoolers?
“If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.” Romans 10:9
After three decades in professional ministry, I think I’ve finally figured out how to make reporting to church council meetings more effective. I’ve tried everything from handouts and newsletters to color-coded stats and even skits.
Here are three key things I’ve learned:
Be Prepared – Speaking off the cuff often leads to rambling and going over time. Instead, write down your points. After you present, hand your notes to the church council secretary who is furiously taking the minutes of the meeting. They’ll appreciate it and can fill in the minutes with the data you’ve provided.
Be Brief – I now focus on sharing three things, thanking three people, and making three big requests.
3 Things to Share – Though there are a bunch of great things to share, choose two past celebrations and one upcoming event with purpose to highlight.
3 People to Thank – Mention three people who have made a significant impact, sharing a quick story about each. Everyone enjoys being honored by name and it highlights the wins of your disciple-making team.
3 Big Asks – (1) Request prayer for specific goals (e.g., a number of kids to reach by Christmas); (2) Ask for prayer for a champion to step up for a future ministry; (3) Encourage everyone to pray about who to invite to the next Family Ministry event happening in the next 30 days.
Be Part of the Team – In our Leadership Council (using the One Board Model), Family Ministry has a named representative. Collaborate with this person to prepare and present the report. This partnership helps keep our message clear and consistent.
How do you prepare, and present ministry reports to the congregation you serve?
“On arriving there, they gathered the church together and reported all that God had done through them and how he had opened a door of faith to the Gentiles.” Acts 14:27
Every year after Promotion Sunday, Mr. Bob and I take a break and head to the beach. It’s a time to rest and reflect before the busy fall season begins, especially since the families I serve are adjusting to new school routines and have little time to even check church emails.
Rest involves sleeping until I wake up and reading biographies of the saints who’ve gone before my generation. This year we also enjoyed the stories of the Olympic athletes. Forty years ago we shared the Los Angeles airport with Olympic families coming and going as we passed through on our honeymoon.
Reflecting involves sharing together the stories and answered prayers of God’s goodness and faithfulness over the last year before setting goals for the next year.
My August prayer from last year:
Lord, Creator, Director of my life. As I stand on this beach the sand is wet, mushy, and the waves are strong. As my feet sink they only sink so far because You make the boundaries and I submit myself to You. By the time we return in a year You will have settled what unsettles us now and I’m grateful. Let me not sin in any of it. Let me please You in all of it. Let me stand in obedience to Your word. Give me the courage of Daniel, the wisdom of Solomon, the hospitality of the Shunamite Woman, and the courage of Peter. Let me remember I now speak as a Paul, I’m to fast and pray like Mordecai, and tell the stories of Your goodness and faithfulness to Your people like Luke so that the generations coming behind me will know the true, real, mighty You. Thank you for letting me be born at this time. Make super fruitful Your gospel from my little offering. Give me peace like a river, love like an ocean, and joy like a fountain as You lead me on the paths of righteousness for Your name’s sake. Amen
This last year has been the most exciting time in ministry ever!
Our team is on a first-named basis with Panera staff where we first met last December, gathered, planned, prayed, and laughed our heads off. Today I celebrate and submit to a humble and gifted leadership team on fire for the things of Christ, who work hard, and serve with the greatest integrity.
We’ve witnessed physical healings, new and deeper relationships, great outdoor weather providing safe and peaceful spaces for our littles, finances generously provided, and new sacred spaces, Wesleyan small groups, and new community partnerships only the Lord could have led us to. All miracles. So many miracles!
Messages of life and God’s love taught in a funeral home offered by a generous family. This teacher-not-a-preacher gave her first message from that pulpit on New Year’s Eve and will humbly share again next month. Sharing the hard parts and confetti parts with a prayer partner and the family ministry leadership team who love Jesus and His people with their enthusiasm, ministry of presence, and creative teaching. I’m honored to play in their sandbox.
We’ve also faced open hostility and repeatedly turned the other cheek. I’ve let go of people-pleasing and instead embraced compassion and hope, rooted in a long history of trusting in a great God. I haven’t gotten everything right, and I still don’t. But my mistakes were never out of malice or anger. I’ve submitted to the authority over me, and the Lord has blessed it. Silence or cutting people off isn’t an option because we are called to love our neighbor especially those in the family of God. We serve a God who calls us to sacrifice and trust. He is so good.
All the grandkids are being homeschooled this year, so our Mimiland Fridays might expand. The youngest is enjoying preschool at the local church in our neighborhood. I’m trying to guard my schedule to spend more evenings with Mr. Bob. His partnership, support, and prayers have talked me off the ledge so many times.
This fall will be busy: the New Room Conference, Baby Girl’s birthday, a home LSU game in September, a trip to Turkey in October for Paul’s Journeys with folks from our church, Mr. Bob’s and our #2 son’s birthdays, hosting a Spirit & Truth Conference, sponsoring pilgrims on The Walk to Emmaus in November, and then Confirmation Sunday and Campfire Christmas with Live Nativity in December. January brings the Children’s Pastor’s Conference.
Oh, and there’s gonna be this amazing first birthday party of the church I serve come Wednesday, November 20, 2024. Oh the stories we have to tell!
“So I gave you a land on which you did not toil and cities you did not build; and you live in them and eat from vineyards and olive groves that you did not plant. Now fear the Lord and serve Him with all faithfulness.” Joshua 24:13-14
I’ve been captivated by the stories of the world’s best athletes during the 2024 Olympics this past week. As I watch these events unfold while Tropical Storm Debby hits the southern coast, I notice several similarities between the Olympics and effective local church ministry.
In the Olympics, athletes of all ages and sizes compete at the highest levels. This is a great analogy for multigenerational ministry in the church, where faith formation can be shared across generations. Instead of just offering a backpack blessing for young children, we extended our blessings to everyone involved. First, we prayed for the leaders in nursery, children’s, and youth ministries. Next, we blessed the children, teens, and young adults. Finally, we prayed for their parents and grandparents. A special thanks to Christina Embree of Refocus Ministry for this inspiration.
At our grandson’s church, senior members invited middle schoolers to their July luncheon to play board games, with the students bringing dessert. Our church’s empty nesters’ Sunday school class also supports and mentors a new young adult class, offering them fellowship, easy relationships, support, and leadership each week.
Just like athletes who compete individually in their countries come together as a national team in the Olympics, building teams in ministry makes us stronger. During the busy summer months, coaching and training interns allowed us to offer more faith formation opportunities. The youth intern handled Wednesday night programming, the summer mission trip, and designed the upcoming Confirmation cohort. The nursery intern focused on recruiting and orienting new leaders, while the children’s intern directed day camps and planned ministry activities for families with preschoolers.
A laity-driven initiative led to the design of a new church building, where middle schoolers played a key role in assembling furniture, hanging wall pieces, and building standing desks. Each member contributed their unique skills, from art teachers to national designers, making the project a success. Thank-you notes are going out tomorrow.
The Olympics showcase incredible stories of physical struggle, obstacles overcome, joyful surprises, and unlikely partnerships. Similarly, in our spiritual journey, we undergo “soul training.” Our spiritual diet, influences, and the guidance of mentors are essential in helping us grow and achieve our goals in faith. Just as an athlete needs a supportive environment, we too need to encourage each other, celebrating our successes and cheering each other on as we would a family member in the Olympics.
If you are in the path of Tropical Storm Debby, I pray that you find help or become a helper. As we watch the final week of the Olympics, let’s be inspired by these amazing athletes and motivated to achieve great things in our own lives, for the cause of Christ.
“Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord.” Psalm 31:24
The history of the Lego brick dates back to 1932 in Billund, Denmark, where Ole Kirk Christiansen opened a carpentry business making stepladders, ironing boards, and little wooden toys. He named his toys “Lego,” derived from the Danish words “leg godt,” meaning “play well.”
In 1942, a fire destroyed the LEGO factory. However, this unfortunate event led to a positive change. When Christiansen rebuilt, he chose to use a plastic injection-molding machine instead of wood for making his toys.
In 1961, when the LEGO bricks were introduced to North America, they were an immediate hit. In 2000, Fortune Magazine named LEGO the “Toy of the Century.” (information gleaned from Toybox Leadership by Ron Hunter and Michael Waddell)
Serving in a local church, Lego bricks offer valuable lessons.
Lego bricks emphasize the importance of connections. Just like Lego bricks build structures from the bottom up, we build relationships from the bottom up. Unlike Velcro, which latches randomly, Lego designs are intentional in their connections.
Family Ministry relies on intentionally building relationships from the bottom up for and with all of the demographics of a local church. Senior Saints with youth, children in corporate worship, women’s ministry partnerships with missions, and men’s ministry providing the burgers for a family night. Operating in silos is not an option for a robust exercise in Family discipleship.
What makes these connections possible? Two key reasons:
Reliability: LEGO bricks can be trusted before you start to build. Similarly, trust in relationships is built when our ‘yes’ means ‘yes’ and our ‘no’ means ‘no’. Trust is established when we emphasize relationships over tasks, adhere to systems and processes that support collaboration, and clearly define and repeat ad nauseum the core values of the organization. We can’t be all things to all people, but we can be reliable.
Compatibility: LEGO bricks fit together well because of their studs on the top and tubes on the inside. When pressed together, the tubes grab the studs, creating a friction-based connection. While we may not like friction, it fosters a deeper connection when worked through. Friction invites us to willingly and through the power of the Holy Spirit turn the other cheek, not be easily offended, flee from a critical spirit, offer the benefit of the doubt, and live as a grace-filled people for the glory of God.
No matter what we are building, we do it one brick at a time, intentionally focusing on our relationship connections.
Two of our greatest multigenerational connections of my local church are blended worship (prayground family tables, shared sacred holy habits) and community partnerships (offering Jesus-es and hand fans to our neighbors at city movie night, making lunches and placemats for a local mission partner, painting wooden Easter eggs for the city-wide Easter egg hunt, walking in the community Christmas parade, hosting planning meetings for a local elementary school, collecting teacher supplies, etc.).
May we build well, and play well.
“We also have the prophetic message as something completely reliable, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts.” 2 Peter 1:19
I’ve had a twitchy eye since last week. Old southern sayings like “someone must be talking about me” or “I’m going to come into money” came to mind, but maybe that’s about an itchy palm? Anyway, it’s eye twitching season for me.
My eye twitches when the school year calendar is final, and I now have a quick deadline to reserve rooms online and set up registration forms and design promotional graphics.
It twitches when I’m unsure if this week’s last Family Night of the summer will be inside or outside. Setup changes are needed either way, and there are leader calls, texts, tables, power, ice cream, and fake snow to organize. Christmas trees are going up, Chrismons supplies are being gathered, staging starts right after the last day camp of the summer, and the homemade liquid snow is finally in a container that won’t leak.
My eye twitches when I realize I texted the wrong date for MOOOOOOVE Up Sunday to a parent I haven’t seen all summer. The cow headbands just arrived, parent calendars are being proofed, and I hope the specially ordered bag tags with our logo will be ready for download today. Gotta find the laminator and Amazon says the connectors might not be here before Friday.
It twitches when we planned a Confirmation Late Night on the Monday before Election Tuesday, only to find out that several high school small group leaders have an ROTC event at the same time. Phone calls, emails, and Panera lunches with youth leaders over the last two months has landing the plane for a new confirmation campaign with many voices, several new resources, and lots of multigenerational involvement. Making the Confirmation Cohort a Faith Milestone alongside new middle school and high school Faith Milestones roll out this fall speaks to the godly patience of our parents and the creativity of the great partnerships of the youth leaders in our new denomination.
My eye twitches because vacation time, travel ball, and busy weekends mean I’ve missed most of the 5th graders this summer who will be moving up to youth. My eye twitches and my heart hurts. (sniff!)
It twitches because not all leadership positions are covered for the confirmation cohort, youth, children, and nursery for the fall on Sundays and Wednesdays, which start next month. Personal recruiting never stops, and it’s filled with possibilities when I ask, “I noticed you… Would you prayerfully consider serving one month on and one month off for …?” or “I noticed… Would you prayerfully consider serving as the wingman/wingwoman for the leader in youth Class Meetings this fall on Wednesdays?” Then there’s training, Ministry Safe links to send, background checks to monitor, and name tags to secure which tell the world, “We have done our due diligence. You can trust us.”
My eye twitches when it’s training season and I’m preparing to present in south Georgia at a Preschool Conference the morning following a training for family ministry leaders at a new local church following a three-day retreat to write some new guidelines among some of the smartest people in my world. The fact I’m even invited anywhere humbles the daylights out of me. Oh the new stories I have to tell!
Yep, it’s eye twitching season. What do I do? I pray.
I pray for our great God to remind me of who (Him), why (families to follow Jesus and have lasting faith memories), when (His timing and the rhythm of my community), what (there’s still time), and how (if He can multiply fishes and loaves, He can multiply hands, smiles, and time) to make this season His.
And I pray for more: more children, youth, servant leaders, families, resources, kindness, patience, love, grace, joy, just more.
And then there’s this week.
This week, new flooring is installed, wallboard is laid, electrical is inspected and prepared for TVs, Wi-Fi, and new lighting. Seventy-two shipments of new furniture and rugs will arrive, eight saints with power tools and little people will hang signs and unwrap bunches of beautiful chairs, and scripture will shine in eight new multigenerational faith formation spaces ready to lead our community to know and love Jesus with their whole hearts for their whole lives. Our five core values are being prepared for display in 30×40″ acrylic frames, an amazing local craftsman is building the children’s large group space as a place to refuel, refresh, and rejoice in Jesus, and two art teachers of the year are creating wall art for painting or building tire structures.
This week, new LED lights brighten shadows, the last day camp will celebrate Jesus’ birthday led by the most faithful Jesus gals. Youth leaders will play, set, clean, stack, sing, paint, and love on the little ones. School supply prizes for End of Summer Bingo will be purchased and plentiful for Sunday school, and 300 fans with 300 mini Jesuses will be shared by our church at the last movie night of the summer in our downtown area following Family Night on Macland for the sole purpose of just being a good neighbor.
It’s eye twitching season with a good and faithful God who offers miracle after miracle among His obedient. It’s more than I can even imagine.
“On the day I called, You answered me; You increased strength within me.” Psalm 138:3
I learned about this book from Brittany Nelson of Deeper Kidmin, a wonderful one-stop online resource for those in the trenches of faith formation for littles and their bigs. Brittany is the founding developer for a Teachers Pay Teachers website for family and kidmin leaders. I ordered it on the spot and was not disappointed.
The book is laid out in three sections with short chapters (1) The Current Reality in Faith Development, (2) What We Need From One Another, and (3) How to Partner. Each chapter offers a beautiful, clear graphic of the data collected comparing any differences between ministry leaders and faith influencers. Each short chapter lays out responses by the overall church AND data collected by Latino ministry leaders and Latino parents. Each chapter ends with “How Can We Respond” section for Ministry Leaders and a separate section of best responses for Parents.
Faith influencers are broadly labeled Parents to include two-parent families, blended families, stepparents, single parents, adoptive parents, foster parents. Faith influencers also include grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other family members, faith friends, neighbors, mentors, and any other adults who influence the spiritual formation of children acknowledging that everyone has a dog in this hunt of informal education, aka socialized learning ‘as a Christian family goes about life’, nonformal education, and formal education.
“Parents are waking up to the important role they play in their children’s spiritual formation.” (p.17)
Three big takeaways for me as I plan programming, resources, and budget for the next school year:
Intentionally plan for experiences families can attend together and special events for families of children of similar ages to connect. (p.23) MY RESPONSE: Intentional Faith Milestones shared by littles and the bigs who love them and monthly faith formation events as all-skates. programming
The number one barrier to developing faith in their children was ‘too many demands on my time as a Parent. (p.29) MY RESPONSE: Provide take-out resources, aka Family Faith Kits, to resource families to use easily, promptly, and on their own time schedule. Think Blue Apron meal kits, but for faith formation. budget
Break down the silos between adult discipleship and child discipleship, knowing we cannot have child discipleship without adult discipleship. Work together toward a continuum of discipleship that spans all ages and stages. (p.34) calendaring MY RESPONSE: Partner and calendar with adult discipleship leaders in my local church to support the whole family of faith with learning and teaching in small group, community discipleship.
I’ve got my marching orders for this next season.
“The Lord commanded us to obey all these decrees and to fear the Lord our God, so that we might always prosper and be kept alive, as is the case today. And if we are careful to obey all this law before the Lord our God, as he has commanded us, that will be our righteousness.” Deuteronomy 6:24-25
We invited ladies of all ages and stages to Ladies Game Night to achieve three goals: (1) connecting with other local churches of our new denomination, (2) fostering multigenerational love and witness, and (3) nurturing new and deeper friendships through table games.
Event: Ladies Game Night Logistics: Thursday 6:30-8:30pm Rooms: 1 room for large group game (on screen Scattergories & Bingo) then set up multiple board games (checkers, Sorry, Otrio, decks of cards, and a puzzle; 1 room for quick, noisy games (Pictionary, Yahtzee, Giant Jenga, Tapple, Spoons); 1 room for big game (Dominoes). Prizes: Scattergories table winners; Bingo Refreshments: Cucumber lemonade, ice water, individual bags of chips, individual banana pudding cups (another generous lady brought brownie cups just because) Welcome table: name tags, sharpies, registration sheets Cost: $5 per person to cover new games and prizes Prize table: left items unwrapped and set on table for winners to choose
Schedule: 6:30-7:00 Welcome & Scattergories on-screen game 7:00-7:15 Devotion about rules of UNO 7:15-8:00 Game play & refreshments 8:00-8:30 Bingo 8:30 Closing prayer and cleanup
The feedback was so positive that, since some boys and men also wanted to join, we scheduled a Family Game Night every other month for the next school year. We’ll add a theme and ask people to bring refreshments. A $5 per family fee will help buy new games, prizes, and ensure commitment.
Sharing the table is a key part of our Christian community. Game Nights will offer food, fun, and memories, providing a multigenerational chance to learn new games and make new friends.
Tip: For games without a box (UNO, Spoons, War, etc.) I printed the rules and placed with the game pieces just to keep everyone on the same page for the original game play rules.
Chuck Peters, Jana Magruder, and Stephanie Salvatore wrote in Flip the Script: Disrupting Tradition for the Sake of the Next Generation, “Kids and students aren’t the only ones who benefit from finding friends at church. Friend relationships are vital to everyone. Relationships enrich our lives and create a platform for the hard work of sanctification. Relationship-building ministry cannot be confined to kids and students. As a whole congregation, we have the opportunity to create on-ramps for kids, students, adults, families, leaders, and pastors to connect with each other.” (p107)
“As those relationships grow, kids and students will begin to have ‘influencer’ relationships with other parents, older kids, and students.” (p 107)
“Influencers are relational connectors who tend to inspire or guide the actions of others. Pursuing new relationships that extend influence outside of current circles is a way to serve others that will enrich kids and students as well. Influencers of all ages may be the key to helping the ministry of biblical belonging become a church-wide movement.” (p109)
What new games should we include in the future?
“Sing to him a new song; play skillfully, and shout for joy.” Psalm 33:3
We are a church led by its laity in partnership with clergy. While it might seem easier to be run by staff, history shows that the church is most effective when disciples of Jesus come together as a team to worship, serve, and teach. This follows the Apostle Paul’s call to “equip the saints.”
Jesus never sent out His disciples one at a time, but rather two or three and up to seventy with clear goals and instructions. There’s valuable discipleship and coaching both before and after an event, sometimes even more than during the event itself. Ministry has served me well as a guide-from-the-side rather than a sage-from-the-stage reminding me that I am always a learner, too, if I submit to the process of community-based discipleship.
Building a design team for an event helps to:
Involve those who are passionate about the activity.
Set 2-3 goals to measure the event’s success.
Share management of resources, schedule, and spaces.
Define a clear start and end time.
Encourage people to use their gifts, develop new skills, and make new friends in loving Christian community.
Identify potential leaders for future opportunities, building trust and practicing humility.
Observe natural skills and tendencies toward servanthood, such as arriving early to stage staying late to chat and clean up, being responsive, anticipating needs, and collaborating effectively.
Practice receiving and giving direction with grace and humility.
Practice living out organizational goals in a small group within a short time frame.
Learn to collaborate, be flexible, receive direction, and communicate clearly for the good of the organization.
Ministry event design teams can look like a room gathered with jumbo post-it notes on the walls and colored sharpies for a couple of hours. Design teams can also look like phone calls, texts, emails, and hallway or parking lot meetings coordinated among design team members sharing a google doc or other collaborative resource. Design teams can look like weekly zoom call check-ins.
My dearest friends-in-the-Lord have come as a result of serving together on ministry event design teams. It’s a great way to make new friends to celebrate with when the event is over.
It’s a myth that doing everything myself is easier and faster. This approach is not better and certainly not biblical. Working in community is better, and as a staff leader, I have a duty to equip the saints for good works. I’m always ready to make a new friend in the Lord.
What do ministry design teams look like in your context?
“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” Proverbs 15:22
Sunday mornings are for both large and small groups, congregational worship as the Body of Christ, and family worship. Wednesday nights include Youth small groups, prayer groups, class meetings, worship ministry preparations, and more. For kids, we have Bible Study on Wednesday nights.
Check-in is at 6 pm, snack dinner is at 6:15 pm, Bible Study for K5-2nd graders while 3rd-5th graders play gross motor games outdoors at 6:40 pm. They switch activities at 7:05 pm. Dismissal is at 7:30 pm.
We use a homeschool Bible study curriculum suitable for K5-2nd graders, 3rd-5th graders, and Youth (13+). This fall, we’re adding Financial Peace for Teens, another homeschool resource. Homeschool materials can be great for churches if you know what to look for.
Not Consumed Ministries offers Bible studies for ages 4 to 18, designed to help families study God’s Word together. Each study is theme-based with daily lessons, beautiful artwork, age-appropriate vocabulary, and interactive elements like stickers and bookmarks. Our kids love the stickers.
Each booklet has 20-28 lessons, perfect for our ten-week fall sessions and ten-week winter/spring sessions. Lessons include a key truth, key scripture from both the Old and New Testaments, and a central theme.
Last season, we used the WORK Unto The Lord theme, which was fantastic for teaching life application and understanding God’s view on work. Lessons explained that work is a gift from God, and introduced concepts like diligence and initiative.
We loved the WORK study so much that we are reviewing each ‘bundle’ to plan a five-year schedule of themes for midweek programming. This helps us cultivate the habit of studying God’s Word regularly. Our Kid’s Bible study leaders are of many generations who sit as ‘guides from the sides’ rather than ‘sages from stages’, helping navigate God’s Big Book, offering words of encouragement all along the way. It’s a way to set ourselves apart as God’s holy people, teaching children to love the Lord with all their hearts for their whole lives through the study and power of the word of God.
How do you lead young children in Bible study at your church?
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