A Blooming Mother’s Intuition

One of the greatest discoveries during the 3 short weeks since Mr. Yummy’s birth has been watching my child become a parent. She tells me that she wonders when the real parents of this baby boy will return for him. She reminds herself that he now belongs to her. All the responsibility. All the attention. All the laundry. All the snuggles.

Now that I have returned home, I am so grateful for cellphones that take pictures. I also get to “hear” of her own discoveries as she begins to develop that mystery we all know as “mother’s intuition,” such as . . .

1. She can hold and snuggle her baby whenever she wants to.
All the new baby websites say, “Get a schedule,” “If he has a clean diaper and has just eaten, let him cry it out if he gets fussy.” “Don’t spoil your baby by holding him all the time.” Seriously? He’s only 3 weeks old!

2. She can pick out his clothes.
She has realized that she better take advantage of this very small window of opportunity. Choosing your boy’s clothes is a treat. For one who has never been concerned about the weather, she now has to ask, “Will he be too hot?” “Will he get cold?” “Am I willing to let him wear this long enough to debate ‘ Is it worth it to try to clean it, or just throw it away?'” This is a question she will ask about a little boy’s clothing almost every day until he can do his own laundry.

3. She can eat pizza, but only if she has anti-gas drops for Mr. Yummy.
In our day, we had Mylecon drops that seemed to have been discovered by the smartest people on the planet. The stuff could cost $1,000 for every small bottle, and would’ve been worth every single dime. There are organic products that do the trick today, or so she has discovered.

4. When the baby is wrapped in a sleepy wrap, people are less likely to touch you or the baby.
This results in a less treacherous trip to Target or anywhere else that strangers feel compelled to reach for a woman’s chest.

5. A clean and tidy house is way over-rated. 
Between feedings and snuggle-time and tummy-time, the only goals worth setting for a day is to brush your teeth, take a shower, and eat a bowl of cereal. And it’s OK if she needs all day to accomplish all 3.

6. It’s always a good time to read her bible.
Reading aloud is always soothing to baby and Mama…even the books of Ezekiel and Daniel.

May 1st has arrived and I have drank the Mimi KoolAid by joining a national prayer campaign, 21 Days of Prayer for Boys (http://www.themobsociety.com).   My response to a merciful and generous God for a baby boy that will change the world. He has already changed ours.

1 Corinthians 15:51…”Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed.”

Things to Say Instead of …

Guest blogger today is Christine Reilly Peaden…

Things to say instead to a pregnant woman…
1. Instead of “Man, you look huge!,” say, “That’s a really healthy baby.”
2. Instead of “Why are you still here?” say, “It’s great to see you today. You look radiant!”
3. Instead of “Are those pit stains?” say, “Let me turn down the air conditioning for you.”
4. Instead of “Your face is getting chunkier every day,” say, “Look at that pregnancy glow.”
5. Instead of “Are you having twins?,” say, “Wow! You are all baby.”
6. Instead of “Man, you’re butt is huge,” say, “You are carrying that baby low.”
7. Instead of “Wow! Look at you waddle,” say “Stay still and let me get that for you.”
8. Instead of “I could do a geography lesson on your stomach,” say, “Honey, can I get the stretch mark cream for ya?”
9. Instead of “How much weight have you gained?” say, “You are one of the most adorable pregnant women I have ever seen.”
10. Instead of “You haven’t had that baby yet?” say, “You should just go ahead and start your maternity leave.”

Mimi’s Delightful Discoveries

I’ve been a grandmother now for a total of 5 days and I have made some delightful discoveries…

Grandmothers get to be mothers again  This is when I can anticipate my child’s every need before she knows she needs it. Remembering that she likes water first thing in the morning, I have a cold bottle ready. Now that she has to remember feeding times, she probably won’t remember where she put her car keys.  I get to put them where they go. Keeping the seemingly never-ending laundry going without the new Dad feeling like I have taken over his home is a skill. I have watched some of the best Mother-in-laws and been taking notes for years.

Grandmothers get to serve in support roles  It matters more that the new Dad and new Mom learn what makes the baby tick and what ticks him off, than if I do. Serving new parents with no expectations for myself is freeing for the new parents. They gain confidence in their abilities, they exercise their new-found parent’s intuition, and bond as a family. This is their season and I am honored to play a small, supporting role.

Right now I get to answer the door when well-wishers arrive and grab the landlord to take care of some things when he stops by.  There are so many “favorite” parts.  The one that comes to mind at this moment is the conversations my Baby Girl and I have each time she feeds Mr. Yummy in the night.  My bedroom door is open and I can hear them as she whispers to her newborn son in the dark.  I join them as I set a blanket over her cold shoulders. These are the remarkable moments that keep this Mama’s heart from bursting out of my chest.

Grandmothers get new names  Here in the south, grandmothers get lovely new names like Grammy, Gammy, Nana, Nanny, and Gigi.  #1 Son began calling me “Mimi” several months ago and I guess it has stuck.  The new Dad called me Mimi after Mr. Yummy was born.

Grandmothers hold pictures in their hearts  Pictures abound for newborns. Mr. Yummy changes daily before my very eyes. So grateful for facebook to share photos with friends and family. But there are other pictures that can’t be posted. Like when the new Mama was laughing her head off at the waiter at the restaurant the night she checked into the hospital. Like when the new Dad grabbed a hug from me after we heard Baby Noah’s first cry. Like when I watched the new parents shovel food into their mouths while talking excitedly non-stop after Mr. Yummy was born. Like when I wake up at night and see her feeding her new baby by night-light. The pictures I hold in my heart don’t have me in them and I am so glad- I haven’t had a good-hair-day since I got here.

You Should Go On Maternity Leave When…

Guest blogger today is Christine Reilly Peaden . . .

You know you should go on maternity leave when…
1. It takes you 10 minutes and an inhaler to put your shoes and socks on.
2. When you bend down to pick up something you dropped on the floor and your pants split…twice.
3. When your co-workers greet you with, “Wow! You’re still here?”
4. When you come into a patient’s room who just had surgery and they say, “Man, I feel sorry for you.”
5. When you can no longer fit between the patient’s bed and the bedside table to get to an IV pole.
6. When you can no longer text because you hand goes numb due to pregnancy induced carpal tunnel.
7. When you weigh yourself at 8am and again at 10pm and you’ve gained 10 pounds in the same day.
8. When you no longer shop for style, but find yourself looking at the same outfit as a 75 year old woman because it looks comfortable.
9. When you knock over more than 10 items in an hour because you don’t know where your butt ends and your belly begins.
10. When you crash a woman with a stroller into a restaurant booth because you both thought you could make it through the hallway…you should go on maternity leave.

“Every child begins the world again.”  – Thoreau

Today is a Birthday

In 1994, Easter Sunday fell on April 3rd. That afternoon, #1 Son chose to follow Jesus as a little boy in our home church of East Longmeadow, Massachusetts. Today, 4/3/2012, #1 Son turns 18 years old in the LORD.

Our family traditions have celebrated this date, a Spiritual Birthday, with donut holes (life without Jesus is like a donut…you have a hole in the middle of your heart), balloons (we lift His name on high in all things), and a gift (something round that reminds us that God’s love is round about His people.) At some point, the gift began to matter more than the donut holes.

Over the years, the gifts included:

A new Christian CD – we have come a long way from Sandi Patti and Phillips, Craig & Dean.

A matching silver Ring – found on Cape Cod, Baby Girl and I shared 2 matching rings where 3 bands were soldered together, 2 hands (1 representing her Daddy, and 1 representing me, to cover the heart (her heart) on the center band).

A Cactus Garden – One year was more prickly than others, so coming across a round cactus garden seemed the most appropriate gift.

A James Avery Bracelet – scripture to wear around her wrist.

A Crown of Thorns – one that fit the head of a little boy, because it’s what he asked for.

Pearl Earrings – we will not cast our pearls among swine…a reminder of the standard He has set for His Princess of the King.

My favorite part of this tradition is that the gift can not be opened until the receiver tells of the day of their decision to follow Christ. He/She names names (many of these precious servants of Christ are still involved in our lives), we claim the family of faith who provided the opportunity for little people to hear the gospel, and he/she shares the circumstances of their decision. But that’s not all.

He/she also shares (1) what they have learned about God over this last year, and (2) they state his/her spiritual goal to set forth for the next year.

He thinks it’s corny, but when I return home from “becoming a Grandmother land,” we will sit across a table.  I will order a salad and he will order a huge steak.  And we will share “great things He has done.”

Stuff Read Regularly

Serving on a local church staff, speaking at training workshops, and working at “all things little people,” I am constantly asked, “What do you read?” These are the blogs I read regularly no matter what else comes into my email inbox and a new fun find:

http://bookstore.peacemaker.net/blog/  Route 5:9 offers weekly insight on dealing with conflict within the church and in the world.  Reading this blog can turn my heart and mind on a dime.

http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog   Seth Godin’s blog is a daily snippet of thoughts ranging from organizational bullying (awesome stuff on the bully-target cycle), organizational tribes, the way people operate when they have a seat at the table, and communication challenges.  Plus the blogs are very short which I like a lot.

http://www.relevantchildrensministry.com/   Good stuff by Dale Hudson on effectively sharing Jesus with today’s children and families.  He puts stuff out there that I can use this Sunday.  He shared his list of questions asked of parents at his last parent summit by my sending him an email and he responded that same day.  Accessible and helpful so that we don’t always have to reinvent the wheel.  That way I am able to save my limited creativity for other things.

http://theinclusivechurch.wordpress.com    Amy Fenton Lee is an Atlantan who challenges churches to intentionally meet the needs of families of children with differences.  As a long-time preschool teacher, I love how she offers ideas and shares how other local churches across the country are answering the call to share Christ with those who don’t look and act like us. This is especially helpful in offering multi-sensory experiences for little people.

http://flamecreativekids.blogspot.com/   This blog gives ideas of making holy things from junk.  Visual and so much fun.  Great stuff on prayer.

http://www.whenyourise.com/2012/01/teaching-your-child-to-pray-seven.html   This blog is my new fun find.  It led me to a 21-day Warrior Prayer Challenge for Boys that will kickoff nationally in May and a 31-days of Prayer for Our Daughters ebook downloads.  With WC’s KidMin prayer focus as we “Let the Spirit of God grow in us,” I’m thinking we have ourselves the prayer themes for May and June.

And I can’t say enough good things about Pinterest!  This visual girl now has online bulleint boards and file folders specifically for KidMin that I can draw from at my fingertips instead of digging through boxes.

The friends I follow who blog outside of KidMin interests are Pat Dunbar at http://barefootpreachr.org/  and Lynn Watts at http://www.lynnewatts.blogspot.com.  Both are inspirational, beautiful women of faith who are in the business of writing, sharing, preaching, encouraging, educating.  I just adore them both personally and professionally.

What’s the stuff you read regularly?

Children’s Message – Prayer Rocks! Part 2

Prayer Rocks!

1st Sunday: Jacob’s prayer pillow…see the previous post, Part 1.  (Genesis 28:11-22)

2nd Sunday: Samuel’s Ebenezer Stone…when a “rock” is removed from it’s natural state and used for another purpose, it’s name changes to a “stone.” Idea: Our prayers remind us that “God has been good to us so far, and He will be good us going forward.”  (1 Samuel 7:12)

This week we introduced “Rocks & Socks,” and began collecting socks for the local homeless shelter.  Idea:  Because God has been good to us so far, we can be good to others by donating socks for the months of January and February.

3rd Sunday: David’s 5 smooth stones…”Go with what you know and not with how you feel. For the battle is the Lord’s”  (1 Samuel 17:49)

4th Sunday:  The stone was rolled away from Jesus’ tomb to let His disciples in to see that He had risen.  The scriptures tell us that Peter and John ran to the grave when they heard Jesus had risen from the women who came to visit the grave.  John makes sure to tell us that he outran Peter (which just makes me chuckle.)  Once they got to the tomb, Peter runs in and checks things out.  John chooses to stand at the entrance.  John then sees that the cloth that had wrapped Jesus’ body was folded and left in place.  You know, I can tell who folded the towels at my house.  I roll them.  #1 Son folds them in half.  Baby Girl folds them into thirds.  I wonder if John knew it had to be Jesus by the way the cloth was folded?  They did spend a whole lot of time together.  That’s what good friends do.  Idea:  We want to know Jesus so well that we can see and know where He is and where He has been.  (John 20:2-5)

Children’s Message – Prayer Rocks! Part 1

As per some KidMin friends, I’m posting the series of Children’s Moment Messages for Sunday Mornings at WC.

Background:  The theme for 2012 is based on 1 Corinthians 3:16.  The children’s focus will be to “let the Spirit of God grow in you… through prayer.”  Each month has a different prayer focus.  January’s is “Prayer Rocks!”

Growing up with 4 brothers in south Florida and South Louisiana, rocks and sticks were the toys most prevalent. Rocks are spoken of often in the scriptures. We’ll be using them as reminders that “Prayer Rocks!” this month at WC as we embark on this new year of “Letting the Spirit of God grow in me,” from 1 Corinthians 3:16.

In the book of Genesis, there is a story of a man named Jacob. Jacob was on his way to begin a new season in his life. But, he had some serious problems. After a long day’s journey, he used a big rock for his pillow. While Jacob was sleeping, he had a dream. He dreamed about a ladder that went all the way up to heaven.  Angels were coming up and down the ladder. God was at the top of the ladder and he spoke to Jacob. The Lord told Jacob that He (the LORD) would always be with him (Jacob) as the LORD was with his father, Isaac, and his father, Abraham, before him.

When Jacob woke up he knew he was in a special place. He took the rock that was lying flat on the ground as his pillow and stood it up on end like a pillar. He also poured oil over the rock to honor God.  

Do you have a special place to talk to God?

God talks to us through the Bible.  Did you know that you can talk to God anywhere and He will listen?

It’s good to choose a special place to pray because doing this can help us to remember to pray more.  God wants us to talk to Him everyday.  I brought a rock for each of you to remind you to talk to God everyday.  You can set it in a special place.  You might set it on your sink while you brush your teeth.  You might set it on your bedside table to see before you go to bed at night and when you wake up in the morning.

When you see it, you can pray to God.

Sometimes it is hard to start a conversation with God, especially if you just woke up.  You can use the alphabet to help you get you going.

Thank you God for ALWAYS being with me.

Help me, God, to BE kind to my little sister.

Show me, God, how to CARE for my pets without being asked.

Thank you, God, for all you DO for me and my family.

Letting the Spirit of God grow in me through prayer will help me be more like Jesus.

Prayer Rocks!

Things I’m Glad I DID Now That I’m 51

For my birthday last year I posted a list of things I would NO LONGER do now that I’d turned 50. This year I decided to go with the thought of listing some things that I’m really GLAD I DID, now that I’m 51:

1. Graduated college – I wrote my first tuition check for $249 which was graciously paid for by a scholarship from the American Business Women’s Association of Terrebonne Parish. Dave Ramsey states, “You will finish college in 4 years if you are paying for it.” A drive-through bank teller by day. A mall branch teller by evening. An A&P grocery checker on nights and weekends. A few trips to the blood bank to pay for my books. I lived by the mantra of “Educate a man, you educate one. Educate a woman (remember this was the 80’s), you educate a family and everyone who follows her.” Geaux tigers!

2. Give people the benefit of the doubt – People do the best they can with what they know. When you know Jesus, you can’t help but want to see people through His eyes. Releasing others from meeting my needs lets me live life with few expectations. Fewer expectations make for fewer disappointments. Living without the fear of disappointment allows one to celebrate the gifts and graces of everyone. Forgiveness makes everyone look mah-velous!

3. Learned to cook like a Cajun – I moved to South Louisiana when I was 16. I learned to shell shrimp one-handed, chop onions with a paring knife, cook outside, and make a roux. When someone asks where I can find the best Cajun food in the Atlanta area, I tell them, “My kitchen.”

4. Moved north of Interstate 10 for a time – Born a southerner, I had no idea what the world looked like for those who must buy clothes for each of the 4 seasons. A season without Rotel tomatoes, Dukes Mayonnaise, Red beans from Harahan, and Jimmy Dean Sausage opened my heart and my stomach to the creativity of God and His people like nothing else.

5. Let my picture be taken when I was younger even when I thought I didn’t look good – When I look at these photos now, I see a beautiful young woman who just didn’t know she was at the time.

6. Built a relationship with my Mother In Law – It wasn’t easy and we are two different people from different eras and different locations of the country. We are as opposite as they come. Yet, after 27 years there is much to be said for not having to explain everything. And my man says, “Thank you.”

7. Wore shoes that fit my feet no matter what the number was – My wedding shoes were a size 8, had Baby Girl and grew to a size 9. After #1 son, I started wearing a size 10 and they felt so good after I turned 40 that I just went ahead and began wearing size 11. The only problem I have with my feet is finding pretty, flashy shoes with a low heel in a size that reminds me of a canoe…there is a lovely Shoe Town between Canton & Griffin, Georgia that caters to chicks just like me.

The Fifth Chapter

I have balled my eyes out all day as I have finished the 5th Chapter of James. Not because of the answers it provides, but these questions:

– What is the line between hoarding and saving? I’ve watched the TV shows Hoarders and Extreme Couponing. One looks messy and the other has some sort of order to it. One is usually a result of a hurt or loss. The other a result of wanting to do something good. One makes me hurt inside. One makes me wonder.

– If I grew my own food, would I be more patient? I recall watching episodes of Little House on the Prairie when Pa and the family were anxious every time bad weather came for fear of what it’d do to the crops.  The many references to a agricultural life throughout the bible cause me to do more research, because it’s not what we do today.   But haven’t we all spent time “between the rains” of God’s blessings?  Some call it a wilderness time.  Others call it a desert time.

– What should I do when I am in trouble?  I grab a girlfriend-in-the-Lord and I pray.  I confess to seasons when staying in bed was my preference, but I keep practicing to “count it all joy (James 1:1)”  How else will I ever know what He’s going to accomplish if I don’t have seasons of “living by faith, and not by sight?”  More importantly, how will Satan otherwise be proved a liar in my own head?