Yesterday was my first day taking on the new role as a Children’s Ministry Director and it was fabulous.

First day goals:
1. Get to know the Admin, who we all know knows everything and everybody (I brought her Starbucks, we shared stories, we laughed alot)

2. Write down what is already on the calendar from now through end of the year (read through every 2010 Sunday bulletin to familiarize myself with special events and routines of the the #1 used communication tool of every church)

3. Locate all the bathrooms (hey, I’m over 40)

High? The head of trustees showed me how to use a “wall-moving-handle” to move walls, and the email/facebook blessings from friends old and new.

Low? Pictorial directory photo taken with Mr. Bob at 6pm. Anita Renfroe speaks truth when she says that women want one thing and one thing only before they die: one good picture.

I’ll be sharing my first Children’s Moment tomorrow. I hope I don’t trip on the carpet coming up front.

Some dates just mean more than others. Tomorrow is April 1st and memory lane is right where I am headed . . .

April 1, 1984 – Bob and I are in our first year of marriage and he was totally surprised that I’d tape the sink sprayer to come on to share our first April Fool’s Day as a married couple. Don’t feel sorry for him…he gets me back.

April 1, 1985 – Bob calls me at the bank to meet him downstairs and bring the office staff.  He wants to show us the new sports car that Ford just rolled off the line at the dealership he was working at. He was test driving it and wanted to show it off to me and the whole office staff. We waited a good 20 minutes in the lobby before someone made the comment that this might not be what it seemed.

April 1, 1995 – We get word to prepare to head down to Atlanta from New England . .. Bob’s dad is not doing well. The prostrate cancer has won.

April 1, 1997 – We get the phone call that we are headed to Atlanta in a company transfer. I am doing the happy dance to head back south where you can readily get grits, Rotel tomatoes, and Duke’s Mayonnaise.

April 1, 2005 – The worst day of my life and the best day of my life…from 1am-3am, I sit in the presence of my sweet Jesus as He takes two whole hours to gather the spirit of my Daddy and take him to his Heavenly Home.

April 1, 2011 – I begin a new journey as the Children’s Ministry Director at Wesley Chapel UMC in Marietta…Easter is just around the corner and I’ve got myself a brand new calendar with lots of white space. I am most excited about the new people I am about to meet and share life with. So, beginning tomorrow, I will begin to blog on my First 100 Days as a Children’s Ministry Director. The most loving people have already surrounded me at Waleska UMC (where I’ll still be serving as Weekday Preschool Director) and Hillside UMC (where I’m still loved on as one of their own) and now at Wesley Chapel UMC (where the prayer team has so graciously begun to pray for me and my family.)

I’m reminded of the children’s hymn we sang in chapel this week . . .”What a mighty God we serve, What a might God we serve, Angels bow before Him, Heaven and earth adore Him, What a mighty God we serve.” Don’t forget to do the motions, now.

“Discussion was very informative, but I was very uncomfortable with a comment made by the presenter. She loudly made it very clear that she was a “Jesus freak” and glorifies Him in everything she does and if this makes anyone uncomfortable we are welcome to walk out. I thought it was unprofessional, inappropriate, and rude and made me feel extremely uncomfortable. Although I had the option to leave I didn’t feel this should have been an option in the first place. — isn’t a faith based organization is it? I will be calling your organization to discuss further.” – statement from an event evaluation.

This one angry comment among so many positive ones has taken up a lot of space in my head in the last 24 hours.

I am associated with many organizations. Some faith-based, some not. The faith-based ones are easy. Conversation about the scriptures and prayer and programs within the faith-based ones are expected, so when I tend to get “over the top,” I am able to be free and authentic. However, we are called to be involved in the world, so I am also involved with professional organizations that are not “faith-based,” but ARE led by professed Christians.

Over the last couple of years, this and other organizations that I am involved with have asked me to be “more sensitive.”  Submitting to the authority in leadership, I get that. The scriptures tell us that a kind word turns away wrath, and all words are to be seasoned as salt. It is my heart’s desire to draw others TO Christ rather than away from Him or away from a professional organization that can provide the tools and encouragement to others who tread this journey.

I was not the presenter at this event, I was the facilitator of a panel/roundtable of professionals who serve faithfully and successfully in a leadership role.  However, I was reminded that if I made comments that could give the impression that a workshop had a Christian overtone, that I should make it clear up front. I did, and it bit me.

I don’t remember my exact words at the intro and I knew 90% of the women in the room. I’m sure I tried to be funny, but in the least, I tried to be authentic and clear.  My heart breaks that I, in my limited vocabulary, was not more tactful so as to draw this one woman closer to Christ, and instead offended her to the point that I don’t know if she got anything out of the workshop at all.   And was she the only one?

This is the issue for me: It would be so much easier for me, as a Christian, to be involved in groups and organizations that are safe and faith-based. That would be safe.  It would be so much easier for me, as a pleaser, to be so sensitive as to not offend anyone and have no convictions whatsoever.  But that would put a filter on me so great that I probably wouldn’t say or do anything at all. It would also be easy to say that “the gospel is offensive”  and that’s just too bad that she was offended.  But I wasn’t sharing the gospel, I was trying to be sensitive, and instead it came off just the opposite.

This I know…

1. I will invite others to pray for me when I take on such a “front man” role in the organizations that are not faith-based, to pray for favor in the eyes of the audience, and

2. I will pray that I did not do so much damage to that one woman’s journey to Christ that I can forgive myself, and

3.   I pray that someone with favor in this woman’s heart will be able to show her the love of Jesus that she did not hear in me.

The year I turned 35, I made a New Year’s Resolution to make more close friends. We had just left New England and settled in Towne Lake. With the gift of being able to engage a brick in conversation, I enjoyed many acquaintances. However, leaving a wonderful friend and prayer partner in Massachusetts, I just thought it’d be easy to find other women who . . .
1. were Jesus freaks
2. read their Bible and wanted to talk to other chicks about what they were reading and learning
3. could hold deep conversations about just about anything without fear
4. and we could make each other laugh our heads off

What I found was, “not so much.” If I wanted to talk about kids being tested for gifted classes or decorating I had more than enough people ready to offer an opinion and converse one on top of the other.

This gal from South Louisiana was lost from the get go. I was more interested in playing with my kids than talking about them, and my house was decorated in what Mr. Bob calls “Early Halloween:” nothing matches, but everything has a story.

Having released Mr. Bob from meeting ALL of my needs years earlier, I set out to plan to have “lunch” with one girlfriend a week. I didn’t want a group because I felt the need to build deep relationships and you can’t do that in a pack.

I gotta tell ya . . . it was completely intimidating at first. I argued with myself weekly with “she has more than enough friends and doesn’t need any new ones,” and “what if she leaves to go the bathroom because I’m boring and never comes back.” I figured it was worth the risk, because I missed my New England friend and I WANTED A FRIEND.

I am SO glad that I made it a matter of prayer and got over myself.  These lunches have changed my life.  With the transitions that I’ve experienced over the last 5 months, I can’t imagine having come through them with such joy and anxious anticipation with what God has in store for me without these precious women:
– The one who calls me over and over even when I forget to call back
– The one who makes me go shopping even when I don’t like shopping, but I feel better just being in her presence
– The one who will call on her cousin Guido should I need an equalizer and offers up his services regularly
– The one who listens…alot
– The one who I gave birth to
– The one who calls ME baby girl at 50
– The one who text messages me at the oddest times
– The one who drove out in the middle of a workday to bring me flowers
– The one who asks me what I’m reading and what I’m praying about even when we haven’t talked in weeks
– The one who will spill her guts to me in the short 10 minutes we will have to ourselves because we know we are safe with one another
– The ones who serve on my Personal Board of Directors

Oh, and my friend in Massachusetts? Well, she and I are getting together in July to attend a LifeWay conference on serving with and alongside women. And her baby girl is coming here to spend a few weeks serving in Vacation Bible Schools with me in June.

Oh the rewards of being surrounded by Titus 2 women!

The first I ever heard of a Silent Auction was when I began working on a church staff that seemed to have silent auctions at every event outside Sunday and Wednesday programming. I was mesmerized at the items on display, the names on a paper list set just below the item, and the downright giddiness when someone “wins.”

At the Georgia Preschool Association Annual Conference that is held in Atlanta, I serve as the Silent Auction Chairperson. I get to send out letters to statewide non-profits, museums, shows, theatres, and historical sites inviting them to partner with us to help support our educational efforts through the maintaining of the website. I also ask each Executive Board member to “invite” 3 from their respective areas of the state to participate by donating an item or a gift certificate.

This is my 4th year and it is an auction alright, but “silent” it is not. We laugh our heads off, we stalk the items we really want, and I was even “eh, eh, eh’d” by a 2 year old teacher when I leaned in to put in my bid for a Scentsy Smelly Pig. The stalkers stand guard over their favorite items ready to increase the bid when an unsuspecting gawker just happens to bump up the bid by 2 bucks. This is serious!

Items range from a $150 grocery gift card (which is a bargain if you can get it for anything less than $150) to mystery bags (GPA logo’d bags filled with whatever we can’t individually itemize.)

My personal goal is to exceed $2,000. We made it by $400. The website is sustained and there is money set aside to prepare the silent auction for next year.

I hope the Scentsy ladies return to donate next year. They had a stuffed elephant that smells of whatever scent you put in it’s zippered compartment in its back. I think it would be hilarious to respond to someone asking where the smell is coming from and I can say, “It’s the elephant in the room.”

I love conferences! By far, the best place to meet like-minded people is at a conference. Training, product sales and networking, all happen at conferences, but my all time favorite part, which I find the most valuable, is the networking and getting to meet new people who share in my passion to be a leader of those who lead children.

Mark Harper, children’s pastor of Living Word Church in Minneapolis, Minnesota, explains, “Networking is like breathing. It’s not the only thing that matters, but if you don’t do it, you won’t last very long.” For me, it’s where work and friendships get beautiful.

On the last Monday of the month, you will find 4 – 20 Preschool Directors from Cobb and Cherokee counties gathering at the Cherokee Cattle Company in Marietta at 1pm. I have been a part of this networking lunch group for more than 8 years – for as long as I’ve been serving in preschool director heaven. This luncheon is a true priority for me. We have shared not only our professional concerns, but also tears and laughter over families, retirement, preschools opening, preschools closing, continuing education, grandbabies, and sons- and daughters-in-law. I can’t imagine not gathering with these lovely ladies. We usually have a leadership topic to discuss relating to preschool or Christian edcucation, which we share while we eat. And we laugh. We laugh a lot.

On the first Tuesday of the month, I also attend a lunchtime networking group specific to Christian Education in Canton at 1pm at the O’Charley’s Restaurant on Riverstone Parkway. We’ve been getting together for more than 2 years. We don’t meet in January because most of us have begun to attend the Children’s Pastor’s Conference together. We, too, discuss a leadership topic, but sometimes we just pray and share life together. This month’s topic: “How do you incorporate the danger element in Christian Education in your church?” It ought to be interesting, to say the least.

It’s easy to begin a networking group. Call a couple of other leaders in your area of interest and plan a lunch to get together. Have a start time and an ending time. Come prepared with a few written questions to ask one another. In your conversation, think of the other leader first. What can you do to help him or her? Then, listen more and talk less.

Due to the interest of those who are serving in their home churches in Christian Education in North Atlanta, but work fulltime elsewhere, I will begin an evening networking group in April. Let me know if you’d like to be included.

Harper goes on to share that “God works through relationships. When networking is done right, everybody wins. Sometimes meeting new people can be a little scary, but the benefits are out of this world!”

As I’ve been participating in the 90 day reading program of the New Testament at my home church, I’ve found that Paul asks a lot of questions in the book of Romans. I chuckle each time that the answer is, “Absolutely not!” I relate well to folks who speak in exclamation marks.

Anyway, it has gotten me to thinking of the questions that I’ve been asked over the last couple of weeks such as . . .

“What’s for dinner?” asked by Mr. Bob & #1 son. This question used to get me twisted until I read “How To Get Your Husband To Talk To You” and discovered that this one question could just be the way your man begins a conversation. My heart instantly warmed. Today, I am so grateful that it has been on this question alone that a lifetime of communication has begun. It thrills my soul when I have an answer. I do the happy dance, when I don’t have an answer and Mr. Bob or #1 son take care of it.

“This is your life. Are you who you want to be?” by Switchfoot. This is where I’d respond, as the apostle Paul did: “Absolutely not!” But I’m not who I used to be either. I’ve heard this song a million times on the radio, but having just turned the big 5-0, it seemed to be coming through the car speakers in 3-D this week. This I know: I am certainly not who I thought I’d be when I started this trip as an adult. Thanks to the books I’ve read, the people who have loved me, and the repeated surrender to my Savior, Jesus Christ, I’m way better than destiny had planned . . . or so my kids graciously tell me.

“Ever been bit by sheep?” asked an Executive Pastor during a job interview. Absolutely! It has been my experience that sheep bite out of fear. Thus they can be loved on, shepherded, and learn that biting isn’t necessary. However, it has also been my experience that goats will devour anything and everything in their path. HUGE difference between goats and sheep. Check out Matthew 25:31-33

“How are you?” asked a family friend. Several months ago, I would have responded, “Persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” Today, I am blessed beyond belief as the healing continues. I am surrounded by a cloud of witnesses who inspire me and make me laugh my head off. Sweet company, indeed.

“What are you doing today?” asked Baby Girl. Today I get to be a part of a legacy of faith. The 2011 Confirmation class of Hillside UMC, Sixes Rd UMC, and City on a Hill UMC will be coming together this weekend to begin the ride of their lives. For some this will be their first spiritual journey without their folks. For some this will be the weekend they make the most important decision of their lives to accept Christ as their personal Lord and Savior. For some, especially those who I had the honor to teach in preschool so many years ago, they will see a Jesus freak before them again with a very familiar voice. For them all, an environment has been prayerfully and excellently prepared so that they “Ride Majestically! Ride Triumphantly! Ride on the side of Truth! Ride for the Righteous Meek!” Psalm 45:3,4

Upon a visit to every tea snob’s favorite tea room in Woodstock Georiga, I noticed a book, “100 Things I’m Not Going to Do Now That I’m Over 50,” written by Wendy Reid Crisp. I do hereby publicly agree to the following:

When I turn 50 I will not . . .

1. Show Cleavage – I remember wearing a coconut bra for an event last year and had a hard time keeping the thing above rather than at the belt line.

2. Wear inconspicuous earrings – Growing up in South Louisiana, we were raised to believe that if a little bit is good, then bigger is always better. The jewelry doesn’t even have to be real, but it does have to be gaudy.

3. Lighten up on the makeup – or leave the house without eyebrows.

4. Sing quietly – I talk loud, I hum loud, I whisper loud. It only goes to common sense that I will sing loud. If you can’t sing loud, especially in praise to Jesus, why bother.

5. Tolerate bigots – my mantra is “I just don’t see it that way.”

6. Get even – “‘Vengeance is mine,’ saith the LORD,” and I say let Him do it. He can smite and everything.

7. Avoid becoming emotional – I love deeply, so I’ll cry if I want to. And when I can’t help myself, I won’t apologize.  Just pass the tissues.

8. Put “career objective” on my resume’ – At my age it’s more important WHO I spend my time working with and for WHOM I’m working than anything else. 

9. Leave an unmade bed – The rest of the room can look like “Hoarders”, but when the bed is made, there is order in the world.

10. Travel without extra food – A habit I began when we had children that I will continue. Having served in preschool ministry for more than 20 years, no matter what time I have breakfast, snack is always at 10:30am.

I’m claiming that 50 is the new 30, especially now that I can afford to have my hair done by a “colorist” rather than a barber.

John C. Maxwell’s “Leadership Gold: Lessons I’ve Learned from a Lifetime of Leading” showed up on our front steps on Thursday as part of Bob’s next seasonal reading endeavor for his company. During the commercials of the new Friday edition of “The Defenders,” I began perusing through the chapters since we are both students of leadership.

Chapter 2, entitled “The Toughest Person to Lead is Always Yourself,” states that one of the keys to leading yourself is to PRACTICE PATIENCE. The first paragraph goes on to say, “The leaders I know tend to be impatient. They look ahead, think ahead, and want to move ahead. And that can be good. Being one step ahead makes you a leader. However, that can also be bad. Being fifty steps ahead could make you a martyr.”

I resemble that remark. I have the battle scars of my impatience.

There is a momentum that burns within me that is fueled by several things:

1. A sense of urgency that Christ is returning soon
2. Knowing the limited number of days in the vapor of my life on this earth
3. The scriptures teach that the local church is God’s vehicle to express and give His grace and love to the world

Yes! I am impatient. Yes! It has come to bite me in the backside. Yes! I’ll probably do it again. Not because I haven’t learned my lesson, but because I am consumed with loving little people to Jesus.

Maxwell goes on to finish the paragraph with “Leaders need to remember that the point of leading is not to cross the finish line first.  It’s to take people across the finish line with you.  For that reason, leaders must deliberately slow their pace, stay connected to their people, enlist others to help fulfill the vision, and keep people going.”

Taking people across the finish line with you is the ultimate goal.  Staying connected – check.  Enlisting others to help fulfill the vision – check.  Keeping people going – check.  Slowing the pace – I guess I have some work to do.

#1 Son takes our beagle, Molly, to the neighborhood reservoir almost daily. She loves it. She runs, she drinks from it, and at times, she rolls in it. When we moved into the neighborhood 8 years ago, it was just a huge hole in the ground. It’s taken quite a while, but the reservoir now sits calmly in our backyard and offers water to our county and others from its surplus.

The 12th century abbot, St. Bernard of Clairvaux wrote, “If you are wise therefore you will show yourself a reservoir and not a canal. For a canal pours out as fast as it takes in; but a reservoir waits till it is full before it overflows, and so communicates its surplus.”

I have to confess that for a season I have not been a canal nor a reservoir, but simply wading in the kiddie pool of God’s grace. Although faithful to reading, praying, playing, serving, and worshipping, there has been no surplus. To be honest, it hasn’t been enough to get above my ankles. In my blue, plastic, kiddie pool, its typically taken the edge off the heat of life and that’s not abundant living.  I’ve only been stepping in, walking around a bit, and stepping out.

Today, the kiddie pool is set aside. I’ve been jumping into the deep end of the pool of God’s grace daily and there is a surplus of joy to be shared. During the month of January, I have had the time of my life reading only that which is honoring, helpful, and funny. I have eaten only that which is shared with those who love me deeply or make me laugh my head off. I have been reading the New Testament from a Kindle without notes (which really means “without expectations”). I have joined others who fearlessly wear the banner of “Jesus Freak” as we have learned new things through conferences, seminars, books, and podcasts. I have guarded the walls and stopped the leaking. I am so grateful for this season of filling.

“Since my youth, O God, you have taught me, and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.” Psalm 71:17